A man walks into a bar Ouch

What do you call a bitchy unreliable friend? You don't call that bitch at all.

roses are red violets are blue that's just the way god made them

Q: What do you get when you cross an alcoholic and a sex addict? A: A baby

An Irishman, an Englishman and a Scott land on an island. They were on vacation and returned to the UK, which consists of two isles.

The man says to the doctor "Sir, I have contracted a terrible headache." The doctor replies back, "Yes you do."

How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen do? Enough to kill two and a half men

An irish man walks into a bar. He drinks responsibly, and leaves shortly afterward.

What do a Jew and a homeless man both have in common? They both get nothing for Christmas

What has two legs and is red all over? Half a cat.

what do a carrot and an elephant have in common? theyre both orange except for the elephant.

Q:If a tree falls in the forest and nobody is here to hear it, will it make a noise A:That Philosopher probably had a lot of herbal tea in the morning

Person 1:"Knock Knock" Person 2: Whos there.... Wait why did you literally say the words "Knock Knock" Person 1: I have no idea

what is the difference between a black person and a little boy with autism .... the boy with autism is smarter with more education than the black person

POLITE NOTICE: Management Committee here. Please refrain from posting any anti-jokes which are not offensive to protected groups.

Friends are like potatoes, when you eat them, they die.

whats worse than having no life? having no life and reading internet jokes all day!

why did the chicken cross the road? regardless of the fact his job at kfc was there, he felt that exercise was need to work off is thighs

Q: How is a cloud like orange juice? A: Neither have wheels.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coach of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

What is invisible and smells like cheese? Cheese. I lied about the invisible part, because cheese is not invisible.

A black man and a white man and a chinese man are sitting together: Cultural Diversity.

SteVen Hawking wals into a bar

Whats the same about a Mole and an Eagle? They both live underground, I lied about the Eagle.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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