whats long, black, and smells like shit? a big turd

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Q. What did the dead man do after he died? A. Nothing. He's dead.

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Man walks into a bar and goes, "Ouch!"

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have down syndrome duh dusfy druah

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What was the black guy doing in Mississippi? Just hanging around.

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So Superman walks into a bar right, WRONG, Superman flies into bar

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What do a fish and a frog have in common? They can both live in water. Its a well known fact.

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What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for his birthday? A basketball.

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"What would you do if i gave you a million dollars?" "I would scream and jump up and down? Are you really gonna give me a million dollars?" "No i just wanted to see what you would have said, that's all"

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children of those parents which re childless, often are childless too...

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Your Mother is so ugly that men tend to avoid her.

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What is a taco made out of? A. Various ingredients ranging from cheese to sour cream.

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If I earned a dollar for every time you've said, "I'm too old for this sh*t," I wouldn't have made very much money. You are a giraffe.

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Whats worse then getting AIDS Math class

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Pineapple.

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Once upon a time, I farted They believe this now as the "Big Bang"

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my grandpa told me "dont let fear rule your life" 2 hours later he got hit by a train.

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The asian boy only did an hour of study....... nothing was heard of him after his mum found out

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Q: There is an Elf King, King Kong, and Godzilla all on the empire state building. Which one jumps first? A: None, because none of them exist.

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Why couldn't the dead man take a shit? He was severely constipated

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So, two people park their car and walk into a bar. Wait, no. They were walking into a grocery store and they were riding skateboards, not a car. Then, the kid walks in after them. Oh, did I forget to mention they had children? And also, they're married. So anyway, they walk into this grocery store, and meet a barkeep. Wait no that's ridiculous why would a barkeep be in a grocery store. Let me start over. Bah.. never mind. I forgot what happened next, but it was REALLY FUNNY!

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A man walks into a bar a bartender says, 'why the long face'? the man says 'I just walked into a bar'!!!

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What do a black man and an elephant have in common? They are both multi-cellular organisms, they both belong to the kingdom Animalia, the phylum Chordata, and the class Mammalia, they both possess vertebrae, they both move through legged locomotion, they both possess knee joints and they both possess the capacity for altruistic behavior.

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What did the Pedophile say to the small girl? I have served my sentence and been successfully rehabilitated. Please continue playing out in public without fear of being sexually assaulted.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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