A hermaphrodite walks into a bakery, orders an eclair, then leaves.

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why was the pen mad at the pencil? it wasnt. objects don't have feelings

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How many pollacks does it take to screw in a lightbuld? Likely the same number as is required when people of non-polish descent screw in lightbulds. Overall however it is variable based on the number or bulbs, position of bulbs in relation to ceiling, potential shakiness of required ladder, and desired efficiency. Please reference GE's lightbuld home instillation handbook for further information or alternately contact your local electrician or handy neighbor.

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How do you get a clown off a swing set? You throw an axe at his head when he's not looking.

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what do you call a black clerk? one of the 2 billion people with a job, u bum!

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Why did the blonde ask the doctor if she should get a new butt? She is insecure about its appearance and believes reconstructive anal surgery is the only solution.

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What can an elevator do that a mexican can't? Raise a family.

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Do u know where the glue is? nope, i just glued my hand to this table, so im no help to u

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Then that means that, I thought I was working with you? No wonder things did not work out, no wonder jerks like Jonas "the wizard" got inside my team, he was recommended by this "Axel Knight"

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There once was a man from Nantucket Who was stung on the head by a wasp When asked if it hurt he replied, 'not a bit, and he could do it again if he'd like to.'

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What's worse than a baby in a blender? Two babies in a blender

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? Whatever you like, it can't hear you.

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How do you get five black men in a car? You offer them a good deal, then show them the car fax.

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Knock, knock -The door's open.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. The man apologizes, and the bra assures him not to worry. They both continue on their way. The man wonders what a bra is doing walking around unattached to a woman, especially this late at night.

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What made your girlfriend laugh to death? You dropped my pants.

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Q:What's funny about a Jew marrying a Nazi? A:The situation

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It is Scientifically proven that, if you have a shower in china... you get wet

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Justin Beiber walks into a bar. He is not served any alcohol because he is not yet 21.

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Refrigerator

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How do you get a black man down from a tree? If the man cannot climb down himself, perhaps call the fire department.

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whats sad about 3 black people driving a Cadillac over a cliff? that was my Cadillac

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The fox said to the walrus, "Hatee-hatee-hatee-ho!" And the walrus replied, "Goo-Goo-g'joob".

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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