Q: Why did the black man have a gun? A: We was recently indicted for insider trading and preferred suicide to a long prison sentence.

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Knock, knock! Who's there?! Your Mom! Your Mom who? No really. Let me in.

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Q- what did the magician say after the sawed the woman in half ? A- call an ambulance !

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what is the difference between a black person and a little boy with autism .... the boy with autism is smarter with more education than the black person

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Yo Momma is so fat she is at risk of contracting Type 2 Diabetes.

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if life gives you the back.. TOUCH HER ASS

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So, these two antennas were getting married. The wedding was great, but the reception was terrible!

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What do you call a bookstore with explosive offers? Barnes and Cher-Noble.

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What's the difference between an elephant and a duck? Purple.

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Once upon a time Jimmy was walking home from school. Jimmy was then confronted by a a pedophile so he suddenly ate himself.

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What did the cat say to the towel? Meow.

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What did Hitler say to Mussolini? I don't know. I wasn't there.

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A man walks into a bar but didn't say anything because he is mute.

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How did the blond become a pilot? By attending flight school, graduating, applying to an airline to which she subsequently was hired to, taking frequent training courses, and beginning work.

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What's worst than the Holocaust? No Wi-Fi

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Why did the student cry when he got an F on the test? because his dad beats him.

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If i was a painting... Id hang myself

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient ability. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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A guy asks someone's name. The other guy answer that his name is Steeve.

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A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as that could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

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The other day a man came to my door. After I opened it, he told me, "I'm sorry, your mother is dead." He paused, then said, "Just kidding." "Actually," I told him, "my mom died two years ago of natural causes." He turned around and left, and I closed the door. All in all, it was a very confusing situation, and I'm not sure how I feel about it.

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What did Valerie get for her birthday? Nothing. Because no one loves her

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A Mexican, a black guy, and a Muslim are riding in the back of a car. Who is driving? Their friend Keith.

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What's worse than getting dumped? Being molested by a crazy hobo

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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