Q. Why did the 8 year girl scream and cry when she was raped? A. I have no idea either. I drugged her and taped her mouth closed.

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your mom's stupid face is a dumb butthead. I hate you.

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If Jewish men light a menorah during Hanukkah, what do Jewish women light? Jewish women light a menorah as well; Judaism is a relatively fair religion to both sexes.

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wioFUrwny1c

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I'm Batman.

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A black man walks into a... nevermind, this joke is dumb.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Your whole family is dead And now it's time for you!

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How do you get a clown to get off a swingset? Chop off his arms and legs.

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Henry was struck by a train. He was mourned by his parents.

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Roses are black Violets are black I'm blind

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There are two muffins sitting in an oven. One muffin says "It sure is hot in here." The other muffin says "Holy shit a talking muffin

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How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

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If she's old enough to count, she's probably in second grade.

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My did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Q: whats worse that sucking at piano A: the world blowing up

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? She was blind.

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How do you make a boy cry? Kill his family

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A man became infected with Staphylococcal Food Poisoning. The doctor said, "You only have 24 hours to live." He died 24 hours later.

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What did the penis say to the vagina? It didnt say anything, the male said to the female "i like pickles."

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There once was a boy. On his birthday, he got a small puppy. The puppy was white and had big eyes. Boy loved his puppy and the puppy loved the boy.

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What's worse than a holocaust? two holocausts.

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how much does a pirate pay for an earing? $2.50

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Yo mommas so fat that when she walked into the ocean all the whales were far away. However, if the whales did happen to be closer to your mom it would be highly improbable that they would sing.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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