What is red and ragging? A Hemorrhoid

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What is blue and has wheels? Grass- I lied about the colour and the wheels.

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ALCATRAZ IS REOPENED!

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Q: How many Marys does it take to drive you crazy? A: Just one ::stares at Mary Annoyingly::

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Q: what is an anti-joke? A: Coffee Volvos

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The movie starts off with Tom Cruz jumping out of a plane. He hits the ground and dies, end of movie. - Cole G.

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Q: knok knok A: Im home

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Did you hear about the woman that died of a heart attack? More oxygen for us!

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Hot Lady: What do you do for a living? Guy: Phosphorus, Oxygen, and Radon. Hot Lady: So you are a chemist? Guy: Think again! Think about Acronyms... Hot Lady: OPRa, so Opera correct? Guy: (Obviously talking to a Blonde) P, O, Rn Hot Lady: So, you are a chemistry teacher! Guy: (Sighs to himself thinking how PORn relates to chemistry. Which it does in biochemistry, but he does not know that).

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A man walks in to a bar and orders a drink. He has been drinking alone every day since his wife an unborn child died in an horrific car accident.

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What has a skinny head and specky? Josh Moran.

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A man walks into a bar and sees an attractive blonde. He is afraid of talking to her so he goes home and masterbates himself to sleep.

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What dinosaur makes honey? The Bee Rex.

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A penguin is walking through the snow, and comes across a polar bear with a hat on. He stops and stares at the polar bear for a second and then compliments the polar bear on his hat. The polar bear smiles and promptly consumes the penguin, building up a fat layer for the coming Winter.

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What is black and white and sleeps a lot? A tired zebra.

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What is 1 inch long and eats everyone in it's way .... my pet fish

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Why was Susie crying? There was a frog stapled to her face.

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Q. Why do televisions come with clickers A. So you don't have to get up to change the channel

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How do you make a plumber sad? Kill his family...

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WHY DID THE MAN FART HE WAS A FARTY PANTS AND WE CAN CHAT HERE ON THIS WEB GO TO ANTI JOKE SEE ME I WILL GIVE U JOKES

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why was the tolit stoped up. because it had phoo

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Your Mother

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so the weather's nice...

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That awkward moment when sentences don't end the way you octopus.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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