What is life? It is a sexually transmitted disease which always ends in death. There is currently no known cure.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

You are in a sealed room with Joseph Stalin, Osama bin Laden, and Hitler and have a revolver with two bullets. Who do you shoot? None of them. You awkwardly set the gun down and wonder how to get out of this room filled with three corpses.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

There once was a man from Peru. Who dreamed he was eating his shoe. I shot him in the head. With a bullet made of lead. And now he's dead. No more shoe ingestion

thumb_up thumb_down +22

I asked a girl on a date. She said no.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why was 9 afraid of 10 because 10 was a registered sex offender

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What's more exiting than watching football Escaping through the underground railroad

thumb_up thumb_down +22

So, a Hispanic, Jewish, Asian man are on a plane. The pilot turns to them and says "Aren't you tired of this?"

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A cat walks into a bar and orders a bowl of milk. Well, okay, it doesn't actually order it. It more of meows in a begging fashion and the bartender, being a kind individual, gets the lost animal a bowl of milk. But who's to argue semantics?

thumb_up thumb_down +22

how do you know if an asian gang has been to your house? 1. your computer is unplugged 2. your homework is finished 3. they are still trying to back out of the driveway

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did the man not come out of the closet? He wanted to stay in narnia.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

I never knew I was dyslexic. Then one day I showed up to a toga party dressed as a goat.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

How did the stuntman die? He was gored by a buffalo on a trip to Yellowstone.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A man walks into a bar. He walks out again remembering he forgot his wallet.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

why was little johnny laughing all day cactus

thumb_up thumb_down +22

I want to name my dog Syndrome. Then, when I teach him to sit, I can say "Down, Syndrome!"

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Rebecca Black. That's it. That's the joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What did the Mexican get for christmas? Nothing, he was caught sneaking over the border in November.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Whats the first thing you do when your grandmother gets hit by a toaster? Buy a new toaster.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Coach walks into a bar and asks for a drink. The bartender says, i can't serve you. You aren't wearing pants. Coach says "put it on my bill."

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What's worse than stepping on legos? Massive genocide

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What do you get when you cross a surfer and a black man? An angry surfer and an angry black man. You really should be nicer to people.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because Acl tear stepped on a spit.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

what do you call a joke that makes no sense? a joke that makes no sense

thumb_up thumb_down +20

If Chuck Norris were to roundhouse you. Then something previously happened before the altercation, that caused tension.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops