What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? What do you mean what's the difference?!?! One of them is a fucking elephant!

Q: What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? A: His name.

Why did the little girl drop her school books? A kid jacked her in the head with a brick.

Human: Are you a frayed knot? Frayed knot: I'm afraid so.

Everyone is equal. It doesn't matter if you're black, red, yellow, brown, or normal.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was in the designated crosswalk area and there was no oncoming traffic.

who dosent like to wear shirts and is not straight Petko Manchev

I walk into a bar...

A termite walks into the pub and says "Is the bar tender here?"

Why did the chicken cross the road? A man held him at gunpoint and threatened to kill his entire family.

I accidentally solicited a prostitute today. I was driving in an iffy neighborhood and saw a woman on the sidewalk, so I stopped to ask if she could give me directions. She must have misheard me.

What did Pikachu say to Charmander? Nothing. Pokemon are fictional creatures, and thus, do not exist.

Why did the boy go to the hospital? He didn't. Unfortunately the gunshot wound severely injured the boy and he was unable to be revived in time to survive.

What's worse than finding an apple in your wo- wait, what?!

Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

What do tigers dream of when they take a tiger snooze? Mike Tyson

How do you wake up your grandmother........ You don't, she had a massive heart attack and died in her sleep

Why did Alex fall off the swing? he had no arms

What happens if you go one louder? Nothing because you can't

Were can you find a bag of meth?

What did the fly say when he went to Dunkin Donuts? Can I have a doughnut?

why didnt the llama eat the string bean? Becuz he was a vegetarian

Q. What did tthe little kid say when the bully punched him? A. Ow.

Yo momma so fat, the last time she saw 90210 was on the scale!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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