The man decides to jump off the bridge and decides to make one last phone call. "Hello, Jane, this is Doug. I just wanted to let you know, from the bottom of my heart, that I love you." Person on the phone says "This is not Jane, this is Joe." "Oh, hi, Joe. Could you just tell your wife what I said. Bye." The man continues to jump down the bridge and swims with his beautiful girlfriend. They all had a great day.

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Vagina Boob

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Your moma's so fat, she has a considerable list of medical health problems, and she is very miserable.

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What do you do when a man in a corner offers you candy? You walk away.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas A bike.

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Who's the biggest badass in the nation? Adrenaline junky Jacobs!

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A man sees another man sitting on a bench with a pickle in his ear. He asks the man "Why do you have a pickle in your ear?" The other man replies "What? I couldn't hear you because I have a pickle in my ear."

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Why is 6 scared of 7? Because last year, when 6 was going to the gas station, 7 approached him and said "gimme all your money or else I'll shoot you". 6 was so scared he ran away crying. About a few days later 6 spots 7 again and this time he was with 9. He said "yo 6! If you don't give me your money, im gonna do this to you!" and then 7 started biting and chewing 9 as if he was some kind of cannibal. 6 ran away and called the police. He told him that 7 ate 9.

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michael: How old do I look? stranger: about 68? How old are you? michael: I cant remember I have alzheimers. michael: How old do I look?

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Knock Knock? whos there? The man at the door then finds himself thinking what his last name is as he lately got amnesia

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What do you call a man covered in bees? Nothing, you'll startle the bees!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why do you care what a chicken thinks?

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Why was the anti joke funny? because it wasn't funny.

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why does jake have so many guns? hes compensating

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Why is ms Wolfe mean? Because she is a poop face

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What's worst than a crying baby? A dead baby What's worse than a dead baby? A pile of dead babies What's worse than a pile of dead babies? If there's an alive one at the bottom What's worse that an alive baby in a pile of dead babies? If it has to eat its way out.

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what did the african boy get for christmas - not food

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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what is better than your entire family getting brutally murdered applesauce

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What do you call a gay jewish guy? Heblew.

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Q: What's that white, sticky stuff on your mom? A: Glue

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What starts with D and ends with ICK? Drumstick.

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Knock knock. Who's there? You're a faggot.

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How many surrealists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Fish.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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