What did the doctor say to his patient? You were supposed to die 12 seconds ago....

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Q: What is the scariest thing ever? A: Child Birth.

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why was the old man cold? ...WHY?

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Knock Knock Who's there? no one, you've got Psycosis

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"knock knock?" ITS 2012 WE HAVE DOOR BELLS!!!

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25

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why did the kid with no legs get eaten by wolves? he couldn't get away

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Wanna know what is gross? a dead baby in a dumpster. Grosser? Ten dead babies in a dumpster. Grosser? There is a live one at the bottom. Grosser? It ate its way out. Grosser? It came back for seconds.

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A: My dog has no nose. B: How does it smell? A: Terrible.

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why did the man steal change from the tip jar? he wanted another state quarter for his collection

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What gets wetter as it dries? Sarah Jessica Parker

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What's the difference between a black guy and a white guy mushroom soup in my testicles belly Buton cheese.com ( tickle my. Nipple frog)

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Q.what do you call 7x7 A.A math equation

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Q) What do you call a black president? A) Mr. President

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Why did the little boy run away from the beach? Hurricane Irene.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust Whats worse than the holocaust? getting raped by a giant scorpion What's worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? getting raped by your seventh grade math teacher, Mr. Smith What's worse than getting raped by your seventh grade math teacher Mr. Smith? Snapping your femur bone in half What's worse than snapping your femur bone in half? Birthing a dead baby

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Why was 6 afraid of seven? seven commited statitory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8, murdered nine, was sent to jail for life, let out early for community service, and told 6 he was coming forhim 6 months later.... 6 commited suicide by jumping off a cliff his body was never found his family didnt get to say good bye thats why 6 is afraid of 7

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Why did the boy throw his clock out the window? He was furious because it was the fourth time that week that it failed to wake him up for school, and he was going to be late again.

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Q: How do you fit 30 Jews in one car? A: Two in the front, two in the back, and the rest in the ash tray.

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Q: Why did the kid cross the playground? A: To get to the other slide

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A blind man walks into a bar. The next day he goes out and buys a new seeing eye dog.

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What do you call a tortilla from venezuela? A tortilla.

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I like my women like I like my coffee... 2 cream 1 sugar.

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I baked tonight. What did you bake? Brownies. What kind of brownies? Chocolate.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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