Q: On a scale of 1 to 10, what is your favorite color of the alphabet? A: Apple

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What does God say when a balck person is person is borned? "Another burnt one"

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While i was driving, my son asked, 'Have you had an accident in the last 5 years Dad?' And I replied, 'You're almost four now son'.

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Huh, I never succeeded in any of those, and I tried a lot. Please tell me you never gone with something nasty like that...

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Q. Why did the 8 year old girl scream and cry when she was raped? A. I no idea either. I drugged her and taped her mouth closed.

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What happens when you mix bath salts, marijiuana, and crack cocaine and proceed to inject it into your body in some manner? You have one of the biggest trips of your life in which it will ware off and you will proceed with your life

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- Do you want to hear a joke? - No. - Ok.

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There once was a man from Madrass, whose balls were made out of brass. This was incredibly embarrassing for him, and rendered him infertile and impotent, which in turn affected his relationships with women.

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What did the tree say to the other tree?....nothing cause trees can't talk!

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How did Clumsy Clearance eat shit? He was in the Human Centipede.

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I'm sn otter

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a kid was running across the street. he just got hit by a truck

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Hey! What dhujv hushichk jgdwrggy man? Go home Sally, you're drunk

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Why did Captain Obvious crossed the road? Because that's the name of the chicken

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Dan walked into a jelly fish

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Why couldn't the black man get a high-paying job? because he lived during the harsh and cruel times of slavery.

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Why did the goose cross the road? He was playing duck, duck, goose

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Q: If it takes a chicken a day and a half to lay an egg and a half, then how long would it take a monkey to kick the seeds off of a dill pickle. A: I don't know. That's a stupid question.

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How do you get a tower to move? Hit it with a plane.

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The only thing worse than finding a repeated joke on Anti-Joke is finding a REAL joke on Anti-Joke

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"Hello, is this the Krusty Krab?" "No, this is Patrick."

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Why did the guy hate the man that said,"I respect you?'' Because the man was Hitler.

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Why did the bird fall out of the sky, It hit one of the random green pipes.

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Whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? Jews undergo metabolism, maintain homeostasis, possess a capacity to grow, respond to stimuli, reproduce and, through natural selection, adapt to their environment in successive generations. More complex living organisms can communicate through various means.[1][5] A diverse array of living organisms (life forms) can be found in the biosphere on Earth, and the properties common to these organisms—plants, animals, fungi, protists, archaea, and bacteria—are a carbon- and water-based cellular form with complex organization and heritable genetic information. Pizza does not.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops