Is it a bird, is it a plane?! No it's.... It's a bird.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What did the redneck say about his missing tractor? Where's my tators.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

How many jews does it take to stop hitler. no one knows they didn't

thumb_up thumb_down -25

A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 20 years later he would gamble away his life savings and then go onto live a lonely and unfulfilled life.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What is worse than 10 babys in 1 garbage can? 1 baby in 10 garbage cans.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

How many cavemen does it take to change a lightbulb? A caveman wouldn't know what to do with a lightbulb.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

A little boy walks up to his father and asks him a question, "Daddy, how are babies born?" His father then replies in an enthusiastic manner, "You see, I stuck my dick in your mom's vag and started pounding. Apparently two condoms defeat the purpose."

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What was the leg less and armless mans favorite type of music? Nubstep

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Whats worse than finding half of a worm in your apple? Noticing the apple is oversized and finding half of a dead baby.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What do you call the worst band ever? Nickelback.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

A man walks into a bar and the bartender says "Sorry sir we're closed" So the man goes: "Oh, okay. I wasn't sure if you guys were open till' 10pm tonight" and the bartender goes "No, thats only on the weekends" The man thanks the bartender and proceeded to leave the bar. He now knows the arrive earlier the following day.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

why was the fat man excercizing? because he was a fatass and no one liked him

thumb_up thumb_down -27

How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

A woman walks into a bar, and the bartender says "Yes ma'am?". She orders a gin and tonic, but the bartender had gave her two without realising, and so she pays for one only. She starts to contemplate whether to tell the bartender about his error or to just leave it and have a free glass of gin and tonic. However as she is a christian, gluttony is a sin, and she already had enough to drink today. However, she feels the need to have a relaxing drink today, because as she was on her job as a receptionist, when a customer tripped on the last step of the stairs behind her and broke his neck, dying instantly, which deeply saddened her. This later led her to indulge on 3 glasses of red wine in the staff room. She finally concludes after a few moments pondering, to not tell the bartender about his error, and pampered herself with two relaxing glasses of gin and tonic. Her dead, mutilated body was later found in the rubble of a car after a head-on collision with a truck.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Roses are red, violets are blue, why am i even talking to you?

thumb_up thumb_down -27

everyone dislike the first joke on page one

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Roses are red Violets are blue I don't like poems What rhymes with poem?

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Your mom is so stupid, that she took an IQ test and was proven mentally retarded. Her family is devastated.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

The police shouldn't have cars. They should use skateboards and use flowers as their gun. When they catch a criminal in the act, they have to hug him before sending him to prison

thumb_up thumb_down -27

what do black and white people have in common? when they dont wear sunscreen, they get sunburnt, except for black people.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why did the frog die? He had AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Where does Elmo live? In Sesame Street.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why did the woman spend all her time in the kitchen? For fear of her abusive husband.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

why didn't the boy get any presents for his birthday? because when his dad went to the store to get him some presents he ended up buying presents for himself like a huge douchebag.... and the apple doesn't fall from the tree so his son is a douchebag too and doesn't deserve presents.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops