Why did the man's motorcycle not move when the street light turned green? Because it was a filing cabinet.

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what do you call someone who cant breathe? dead

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Knock knock Who's There? Me I kill you again HA HA HA

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What do you call a horse with wings and a horn on his head? Drunk

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What do you tell your friend who has been cheating on his wife? You're a terrible human being, and she deserves better!

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What is the weirdest way to get AIDS Having Sex

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what gets louder as it gets smaller? a baby in a trash compacter.

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What did one muslim say to the other muslim? Nothing, muslims are inanimate objects and can therefore not speak.

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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I'd like to make this joke funnier but I can't. It's stupid. I don't even like it.

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Why did the little and energetic girl fall down? Because I snapped her neck.

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Q: What would happen if you didn't sleep all night? A: You would probably be really tired and start seeing things and speaking strange sentences as a result.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didnt, it was hit by a car

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What did the pineapple say to the apple? Nothing, neither can speak.

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Whats worse than a bullet in the head? i have no idea, i have never been shot in the head so i'm not sure what to compare it to.

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Your mother is so fat that she's more prone to cardiovascular disease than other people who stick to the proper BMI or body mass index

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A man walked into a bar. He was only 19, but technically a man. Underage drinking is not O.K.

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What did the baseball coach say to his son? Nothing. He was dead.

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i homeless man asked for ome change. he didnt get any because people were afraid he would spend it on drugs

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What is worse than the Haulocost? Running across Africa with KFC

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What do you call a man with a fork stuck in his head? A man with a fork stuck in his head

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Q:what is long ,black and red but smells like poo.? A:poo from someone dying of bowel cancer.!

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who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Osama Bin Laden

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What's wheels and has green? Lied, I grassed about the wheels.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops