What do you call a 5 year old with no friends? A sandy hook survivor

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Why did the girl have twins she was raped

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What's worse than dropping your ice cream? Getting a virus that slowly deteriorates your body from the inside out.

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5 little monkeys jumping on the bed. one fell off and bumped his head. momma called the doctor and the doctor said "your son is now a vegetable. he can no longer use his brain for things such as moving, talking, or eating. you are going to have to take care of him for the rest of his life. it is also going to be a burden on you and your husband because taking care of someone in this condition is very expensive, and could end up costing thousands of dollars each year."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I can't really remember the reason, it was about 5 years ago and a lot of things have happened since.

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Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red paint

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Why didn't the blond cry at her child's funeral? She died, too. It was a terrible accident.

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A squirrel and an owl are sitting in a tree. The squirrel turns to the owl and says nothing, because it is a squirrel and squirrels can't talk. The owl turns to the squirrel and eats it, because it is a bird of prey.

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What do you call a hot underaged girl. off limits i am her father.

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Roses are red Violets are blue You're daughter has terminal cancer.

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Why couldn't the girl climb out of the pool? She drowned

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Cool story bro. Tell it again.

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Anti-Joke is a silver bullet.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A drum set.

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A street performer was sitting on a curb playing guitar when a black man walked up and put some money in the guitar case. The street performer nodded in appreciation of the man's donation and continued to play his instrument.

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I remember my grandfather's last words he said to me before he kicked the bucket...."Hey, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was standing next to you.

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A boy walks into a bar, then walked out. He's not 21!

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What do you call an Ethiopian with a yeast infection? Quarter pounder with cheese.

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How many black people does it take to change a light bulb? Zero, they already stole them all.

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How do you make a lumberjack cry? By murdering his family.

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what do you call and man that has a twitch every time someone say tissue broken arm, leg, hand, collar bone and there iphone? A mentally and physically demented man that needs serious help from a psychotherapist otherwise matter would get increasingly worse

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What's the only thing more horrible than trash can full of dead babies? A live one at the bottom. What's more horrible than that? He has to eat his way out. What's more horrible than that? He goes back for more. What's more horrible than that? This all took place in my garage while I was watching.

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I was strolling along the countryside and saw 2 niiggers peacefully hanging from a tree

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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