A pirate walks out of a bar. He drowns in a puddle.

A rock walks into a bar. The town goes into extreme panic and is abandoned because rocks are inanimate objects.

I dont have a girlfriend

How do you save Africa. Put a rash of bacon in and envelope.

Golgo12 here, I can see how some people consider you insane Nero, glad to know point zero is the starting ground of your elysum, that should show them how a modern society should be like. You got six years left to live? That sucks man sorry to hear that. Ur real name is Nero? Axel Knight sounds so much more... You.

What do tomatoes, apples, oranges, lemons, and peaches have in common? They are all fruits.

What is three times more dangerous than war? Three wars.

roses are red orchids are black I like you best when you lye on your back

Why was the boy considered a bitch? His name was Jason Jubin

An American, a Mexican, and a Chinese person are in an airplane. The three of them ponder throwing someone out for a racist reason, but decide to fly to the destination.

Why did Sally fall of the swing? She had Down-Syndrome.

I hate long jokes -_-

What do you call a man in Afghanistan? Either a scuicide bomber a soldier or a tep

What do you call a man with no arms or legs sitting on a doorstep? Whatever his name happens to be

What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? Still a pilot.

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A jew is a person of the jewish faith and a pizza is delicious food.

why is your mother dead? because i killed him.

I'm attracted to you like the earth is attracted to the sun. With a force that is inversely proportional to the distance squared.

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? I dont know so why are you asking?

What's the difference between an eight year old girl and a Jew? Only one comes back from camp.

How did the blond become a pilot? By attending flight school, graduating, applying to an airline to which she subsequently was hired to, taking frequent training courses, and beginning work.

What do you call an african american child that hasn't eaten in a week? hungry.

I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

How do you kill a red elephant? You can't red elephants don't exist.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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