whats the difference between a fur rug and a pile of dead babies? i dont lie on a fur rug to pleasure myself

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Hey, I just met you And this is crazy I have Alzheimer's Hey, I just met you

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Parents are very similar to trees. They fall over when hit repeatedly with an ax.

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People used to throw rocks at whores. Now they're throwing wood. *Hint. Hint.*

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Q: What did one muffin say to the other muffin? A: "AAAA! A TALKING MUFFIN!"

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I take the "the" out of Psychotherapist

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Why do women live longer? Once they're sexual and metabolistic hormones are moleculy different from men's, their metabolism is different and act on different organs and vice-versa. Therefore, they live longer. Still, in a worldwide average, more men born than women.

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Polly went out for a fag. Then she was raped.

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An man walked into a bar. Unbeknownst to him, the bar happened to be a having a Rave party. The man, having epilepsy, proceeded to have a seizure. Luckily, a paramedic was there and saved his life.

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Spoiling your fun. Jesus said on the cross, I shall return. Then he returned three days later to say goodbye to his people. Moral: What the fuck are you Åsshats waiting for? The third coming?

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Steven Hawking walks into a bar

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Knock knock? Who's there? Not Schrodinger's cat, or is it?

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Men's rights Because its an anti-joke

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What is a dead cat on the side of the road. A free cat.

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Roses are red. Violets are black. Why is ur chest as flat as ur back?

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Why was the boy crying? Because his dad comes home drunk every night and beats him.

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why did the gay person cry? he was said that he couldn't marry his boyfriend.

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What did the fat man buy at Mcdonalds? A unicorn

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Doctor: Knock, Knock Patient: Who's there? Doctor: The interupting doctor Patient: The interruptin.... Doctor: You have aids.

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Your momma is so fat she has an increased risk or cardiac arrest due to obesity. I ridicule her based on the theory that her morbid obesity is due to the fact that she has a diet consisting of large amounts of calories and high fat content and/or she is known to be very sedentary and does not partake in physical exercise. However, if this increase in body fat content is due to genetics I retract my previous statement and wish only the best for her, also, you might want to lower your calorie intake and visit your local gym, lest you succumb to morbid obesity, much like your mother.

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Why did the Asian eat so much rice? Because he was hungry.

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What do you call a gorilla with a banana in each ear? A gorilla with with a banana in each ear? Unless it has a name, then refer to it by it's name. be polite.

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Why does Timmy Teblow love penis? Logan Cole made him do it.

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Knock knock *I need to either stop masturbating or answer the door* He's probably masturbating. *Who's there?* The other guy left. The end.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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