How do you stop a baby from making bad grades? You throw a javelin at its head.

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Why did nobody like the famous singer? Because she was Rebecca Black.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No. Well, you should, if only for the cultural experience.

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why did sally drown cause she was black

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Roses are red violets are blue you're the middle child no one cares about you

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How do you stop a baby from crying? You hit it with an axe.

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A brunette, a redhead and a blonde are trapped on a desert island. As they investigate the island to find food and shelter they find a magic lamp. Together they rub the lamp and sure enough a genie appears and tells them he will grant each of them a single wish. The brunette goes first and wishes to be back home. The genie claps his hands and she appears in her house, where her husband and children are waiting for her. She is happy that her ordeal is behind her and to see her loved ones. The redhead goes next and also wishes to be back home. The genie claps his hands and she appears in her house. She is not married and has no kids, but she has 2 cats. She is happy to be through her ordeal and to see her beloved pets. The blonde went last and also wished to be sent home. The genie clapped his hands and she appeared back in her house. She wasn't married, and had no kids or pets, but she was still happy that her ordeal was over.

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why did the fish get flushed down the drain? because it was dead

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You're so black that other black people make fun of how black you are.

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In this case, its black operations, but simply in the term that its a well secret something, its not a lets say, organization that breaks the law, kidnaps listens to phones uses wires, which the FBI does. And when I mean I am a employee, I might have spoken a bit over my head here (sorry, lightheaded), you could well, simply put, I am something between a delivery boy and a mercenary, not the kind that shoots and kills (my shape sucks anyways), but rather the kind that "facilitates" communications between organizations... Thats all I can say without breaking laws that technically do not exist.

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Why was it okay for the people in the hospital to laugh at the narcoleptic patient? It wasn't. The patients were treated because of moral obligations, but the doctors that laughed were either fired or warned, depending on if they had previous reports of exploitation of patients.

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Whats the difference between a lemon and an ant? They're both yellow except for the lemon.

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Guy1:should I ask this girl out? Guy2:NO!!!!!!! Guy1:????????

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Why do the children cry at dinner time? Becuase there mother forces them to eat her own faeces and takes pictures of them doing it and posts it on the internet.

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Why did octopus cross the road? Because the road was underwater

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My computer will die soon, and my life is a lie. Refrigerator.

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Henry was struck by a train. He was mourned by his parents.

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wioFUrwny1c

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What did the midget say to the other midget? "We're midgets"

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How do you get your girlfriend's yapping Chihuahua to be quiet? Throw it through a window.

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Whats the worst thing about walking through a meadow of dead babies My boner

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http://i.imgur.com/BJsbT.jpg

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whats the difference between Whitney Huston and rubber duck? The rubber duck dosent smoke crack. hmm to soon?

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if life gives you the back.. TOUCH HER ASS

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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