A man walks into a bar Ouch

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Why did the black guy get hit by a train? I strapped him to the tracks

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What do you find in a pile of dead babies? ************************************************ A dead baby.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a dead baby joke? Dead baby jokes aren't funny.

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whats the difference between a turkey and a baby i dont know how to cook a turkey

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What do u do when life gives u lemons?? Eat them

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This is an anti-joke.

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Q. Name six animals that live in the north pole A.Four polar-bears and two penguins

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What's the difference between a duck?

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HITLER IS SO SEXY I WOULD PAY A MILLION DOLLARS TO HAVE SEX WITH HIS DEAD HOT BODY WHENEVER I THINK ABOUT HIM I SPRAY MY SEMEN ALL OVER MY JEWISH SLAVES YUMMY HITLER JUST MAKES ME WANT TO BITE HIS ROTTING PENIS OFF AND FORCE IT IN THE EYE SOCKET OF A JEWISH PERSON AND THEN I CUM IN HIS EYESOCKET

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Me - Ask me if I am a Frog. You - Are you a Frog? Me - No.

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what is the difference betweeb 69 and 77? 8

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Was that last joke funny? Well this one isn't.

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My mom told me and my brother to clean up o te commercial...but we were watching Netflix

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What do you do when you see a person sleeping at a bus stop? You fart on their head

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Q: what did the black man say after the white man said knock knock A: who's there

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Where are the first Cannibals in the Bible? A. 2 Corinthians 8:1

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The only thing worse than finding a repeated joke on Anti-Joke is finding a REAL joke on Anti-Joke

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A man in an airport asked me if i wanted my bag to be carry-on. So i said yes.

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knock knock who's there who who who and if u say something about an I will punch u in the face u stupid cike!!!!

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"Hello, is this the Krusty Krab?" "No, this is Patrick."

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Fine, the facts add up, excuse me if disinfecting what is left of my eyeball hurts like a bitch and reminds me of the fun I had losing about half of it and my eyelid left/right eyelid (I cannot tell left from right, I was born that way, on the bright side I can use both hands for everything). You know, I am sorry for taking such drastic measures, you know I could have spent the entire day with my wife and both my eyes, we where going on a trip around the world and stuff. Instead she is in police custody and I am stuck looking like a fucking pirate and my friend here does not quite get that its not the aching burning pain of living hell that gets to me, but rather the sensation of feeling pain at the core of my fucking eye whose sensation is so fucking overwhelming that I get just a little bit ticked off. Fucking hell am I glad we do not have a kid. I cannot pick up the phone, you see, its not my number, I paid off a couple of friends (do not really know them) To change their names to Nero. Now, if this is true and you have no idea who assaulted me, then you should have no problem knowing that I wont reveal where you live because we live pretty close to one another, you are not the only one that has proxies. If you do not mind you will have to chat with me here for a while, my eye hurts like a bitch and the fucked up sensation gives me just a tiny bit of anxiety, I will answer the phone, when my fucking hands stop trembling, I already dropped the fucking cell twice. Now it is busted and my friend is trying to put the chip into the other one yadayada, given the conditions I will call you,

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Why did the monkey cross the road? It didn't. It died!

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Why is Taylor sad? Because she's the middle of a human centipede.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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