Knock knock. Who's there? Never mind that. I have a gun and your child. Come out with all your valuables and he won't get hurt.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A Mexican walked into a bar. He never came back out.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Q: Why are black people black? A: Cause they're from Africa.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What did your mom make me for Christmas... ...An apple pie because she is a very nice lady

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What's the difference between jelly and jam? You can't jelly my dick down your throat.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What time will the little girl get up for school? Never, she died in her sleep.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have Alzheimer's Roses are Red

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What would you do for a Klondike bar? I'd go all the way to the store and buy one.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

how do you open a can of coke with no tab? throw a washing machine at it

thumb_up thumb_down -13

This is funny.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

01010010001010010100100101001001010010100100100100100100100100100100100100010010101010101010101011010101010110010101010 Dolphin

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What did the young child with no arms and legs get for christmas? A bike.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

uas;ugbasrG "khVESGF;OQWAEFH;OASEHFO;SAEFUASUusa;uefSOEHFSOEHDF;oasehf;oasehf;uoashvo;uasfo'H EF;owefhoaw;sefoasjefpiwaejf MINTY FRESGH

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What's the difference between a sewer pipe and a French fry? A lot

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Whats Stupider than john? Nothing.. he's certifiably retarded

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What's worse than no christmas? Taking a chainsaw to the face.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why do vampires drink blood? Maybe if they existed you could ask one.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the girl lie to the priest? because she didn't want to tell him the truth

thumb_up thumb_down -13

God

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the 16 year old black kid drop out of high school? He started a successful small business selling mixtapes.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A gorilla walks into a bar and gets a banana martini. The bartender thinks that this is peculiar, and then he realizes he is dreaming. He wakes up and tells his wife about this ridiculous dream that he had. His wife ignores him, and the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes that his marriage is in shambles.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A man walks into a bar.....he then slips on an ice-cube and suffers massive trauma due to the fall. The owner is sued by the mans family and subsequently loses his business. He can no longer provide for his family. His wife is two weeks away from giving birth to their third child.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

what's funny about war? nothing!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

My girlfriend gave me her first ever blowjob last night. I came in her mouth and she washed it down with a can of Carling. Obviously she had to get that horrible taste out of her mouth, so she gave me another blowjob.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops