What was the energizer bunny arrested for? Rape.

What did Batman tell Robin before he got into the Batmobile? "Hey Robin, get in the Batmobile."

A man walks into a vagina. The man, expecting a holiday inn, is very confused, and later gets mauled by five bears, who mistook his scent for a fish.

Why did the two blondes decide to ride in one car? Because it's more environmentally friendly than taking two cars.

darude- sandstorm

what is 2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2-2+2x0 20

The rabbit owns a small business and has trouble getting a loan.

david poredos

If your fighting an octopus on mars how many lamps does it take to repair a dog house? Nine because a toaster cannot ride a bicycle.

Ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they

Why didn't Megan do her homework? Although Megan was an intelligent girl who had always done well academically, she remained unconvinced that anything taught in school held practical or philosophical importance.

A teenager walked into a bar. A drunk man got angry and beat him to death with a club.

What's that on my back? Tell me it's your phone ! Its my phone.

What do you call a fart in a box? Your mom's pussy.

Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the bird.

Knock knock We aren't home Sorry.

what do you throw at a mexican man when he is drowning? his family.

What rhymes with float,boat,moat,coat and goat but can not be on a boat, can not float, can not be in a moat, can not be on a coat and can not ride a goat? A zoat because it's not a real word and therefore is incapable of doing any of those things.

Q. why did I get hurt A. My pants fell off

Why did the 14 year old girl have sex? Because she's in love with her boyfriend and that's how she expresses it.

A white man and a black man were walking down the street. The black borrowed the white man's phone to make a quick call when an incoming call came in. The black man, while trying to hand the phone back, says, "Here, it's your Dad." The white man replies, "No, that's my phone." Amazed at how uneducated the black man was.

A black man with a blond beard came to deliver me a pizza. I paid him, tipped him, and closed my door. I forgot the pizza. Dammit.

Once there was a dog, another one came to it and then there were two.

Friends are like potatoes, when you eat them, they die.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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