Knock knock. Who's there? Obama. Obama who? Barack Obama, President of the United States. I was wondering if I could borrow a cup of sugar. I'm baking cookies for my family, because they really like my cookies.

How do you get 100 Africans in a phone box? Throw a can of beans in there.

Wanna see me count to ten? 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10.

a boy jumps through a mirror and out a window then he fell so now he's dead.

why do cats hate dogs the Holocaust

An American and Russian are arguing about their country. The American says "I can do things you can't. I can walk into the White House and into the Oval Office. I can bang my hands on my President's desk and say "Mr. Obama, I don't like the way you're running your country." The Russian says, "I can do that." The American says, "No, you can't." The Russian says, "Sure I can. I can go to Vladimir Putin's office and say "Mr. President, I don't like the way Mr. Obama's running his country."

What do you call a man with no arms or legs sitting on a doorstep? Whatever his name happens to be

Roses are red violets are blue I can't rhyme fridge

You are pretty bad emulations, first of all you should all swear and cuss a lot, that way you never get green thumbs and you all get minimal attention (negative attention) from people whose messages do not concern. I mean come on, if you are all different, you gotta admit that you are all good at typing like the very same person, its just that, none of them are good at sounding as the guy they are trying to emulate.

Why do black poeple like fryed chicken? Becuase it greases there insides just like there outsides.

Why did little Jonny drop his ice cream? He was his by a bus? Why did the Kuala fall out the tree? Because it died.

Why did the litle boy's hat come off? cause he got hit by a train!

Have you ever seen that really famous blind man's house? Neither has he.

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them

How do you get a girl out of a tree? You throw a refrigirator at her.

What happened to the bus? An unexpected, unforseen, instantaneous, sudden finger began to slowly disintergrate the earth

How did the blind man escape the mugger? He ran into a bus.

what is a chicken answer: chicken

Why was the teenage girl pregnant? She got raped by her dad.

The name "Hunter Barksdale".

a man walks into a bar.... his? drinking problem is seriously affecting his family

why did the cookie go to the doctor? it had vaginal warts

What's worse than carrying a heavy suitcase? Poisoning children.

Whats worse than seeing your mom naked. Your dad.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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