What do you do on Mother's Day? This is not a joke, I don't know what to do.

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Q:What would strawberry short cake never say? A: Very

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Why did the white bartender kick out a black man and his Mexican friend out of the bar? It was closing time

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How to make a plummer cry Kill his family

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What's black, white and red and can't turn round in corridors? A nun with a spear through her head

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waiter! waiter! theres a fly in my soup! the waiter immediately retrieved a new soup and gave them a 50% discount for the misshap.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Why didn't the hispanic muslim woman vote for Donald Trump in the 2016 primaries? Because she lives in Connecticut where the primaries have not yet taken place.

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How much cocain did Charlie sheen do? Enough to kill 2 and a half men

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A man walks into a bar and says ouch, as the bar was made of metal and the man made forceful contact with the bar which resulted him in saying ouch.

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The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of problems with money and she was looking forward to having a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man:"Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor:"You have aids"

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Q:What do you call a black man that got to the moon and back in a space rocket? A: A golfer, he is a pro golfer now!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was baked.

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What is the difference between a Mexican and a bike? they both get hit by cars in shady neighborhoods, like Copiague, New York

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What happens when you put the batteries in BACKWARDS in the Energizer Bunny? Nothing. Nothing happens when you insert batteries backwards

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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Trees are my friends because they welcome me with open limbs.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: He didn't he was chicken

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What is 6 1/2 inches when erected? My penis.

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What do you call a black man with gold teeth? Cruchie.

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Whats worse than biting into your apple and finding a worm? Getting raped by a giant monkey

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Texas! You are doing it the wrong way! Learn from Hitler, gas is cheaper.

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What's funnier than a dead baby? -A dead baby sitting next to a kid with Down Syndrome.

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What is black, white and red all over? An interracial couple that has been shot and murdered.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops