Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no hands. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not sally.

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What makes men cry? The realization that humanity is completely pointless in the infinitely expanding universe and thus any action to try and improve human life is also a complete farce.

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What does a black person call black friday? Friday

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An iman, a rabbi and a priest walk into a bar. It's not the same bar. They feel uncomfortable mixing together and this makes me sad.

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Why didn't the boy drop his ice cream He was hit by a bus and he wasn't eating ice cream

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How to apply total justice 1: Kill all humans! Moral: "Why do I have to die while he gets to live? Nobody gets to live? Sounds fair and just to me!"

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What is worse than getting raped? Getting raped twice.

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Why didn't the man stop at the stop sign? He was violently killed turning at the last intersection

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What did the red apple say when it saw a black man an irish man, and an asian walk into a bar? nothing apples cant talk.

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I like my wine just like how I like my woman 5 years old and in my basement.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? No reason.

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What's worse than the haulocost? Not much.

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What happened to your hamster? It died.

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I have suicidal thoughts

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What's the difference between a car and a sack of dead babies? I don't keep a car in my garage.

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Why do dragons shoot fire? I don't know, I'm asking you the question.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

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Chuck Norris is so strong that he could bench almost 250 pounds in his heyday.

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What did one friend say on his friend's myspace page? You need a Facebook

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What is the pirate's favorite letter? Z.

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What did the Asian say to the Mexican working at the friutstand? Hi, I'm Asian!

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what did the boy with no arms and legs get for chrismas ? cancer

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Q: What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs, living in the mountains? A: Cliff Q: What do you call a girl with no arms and no legs, living on the beach? A: Sandy Q: What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs hanging on a wall? A: A victim of a serious crime, where murder was committed and the killer has a sick and twisted mind because he first cut off the man's arms and legs then nailed him to the wall with wooden pegs. Puppies.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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