how do you rube out a circle? don't draw one

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how do you get an old man to fall? tip over his wheelchair

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Q: Did you hear the joke about the deaf kid? A: Neither did he.

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How do you make a car? You build it.

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I bet I can say the the whole Greek alphabet faster than any other person in the world. The whole Greek alphabet faster than any other person in the world.

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Why did Hitler Kill his self Answer- He got a gas bill By Lewis

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Q: How do you get 1000 babies into a bucket? A: A blender. Q: How do you get them out? A: Tortilla chips.

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Caller:Hello, is this Smellma Pitts Answer: Why yes

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theres a kitten stuck in a tree, whats wrong? it's dead

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What is blue and on the bottom of the pool. A drowned baby

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Hey guys I'm more of a Nets fan.

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What's blue and looks just like water? Water.

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If you spill milk Don't cry over it..... Clean it up.

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I grunt when I poop.

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What do you call a black man called Jermaine? Jermaine!

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Whats worse the people posting real jokes on (Anti Jokes)? 911

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Why did the girl get her hair cut off? Because she had cancer

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The family performs an array of disgusting sexual acts. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "It has no name."

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What's worse than a cow on the ceiling? - two cows on the ceiling.

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What did the elephant say to the other elephant? We're both elephants!

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When life gives you lemons ....go murder a clown.

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What is pretty, has big tits, talks like a guy, and has a dick? Your mom giving me a handjob.

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roses are red violets are blue your friend is a scumbag and so are you

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Why was the chicken afaid to cross the road? because there was no road.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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