Why didn't the baby come to daycare? Because his mother got killed by spongebob

Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

A person from Singapore eats

Why did the girl drop out of school? She was being sexually assaulted by her mothers alcoholic boyfriend and was having trouble coping.

Your mother is so fat that when she jumps into a pool, she displaces a proportionately larger amount of water than people with normal body mass indexes or BMI

man: why did the chicken cross the road? other man: why ? man: i don't know, ask him your self. other man: ...

How many freudians does it take to unscrew a light bulb? Two. One who unscrew the lightbulb and another who hold the penis....eehhh i mean ladder.

Your a bus driver, at the first stop, 4 people get on. At the second stop, 2 people get off. At the third stop, 7 people get off. At the fourth stop, everyone gets off. What is the bus drivers name?

(Pretend you're an orphan.) Knock knock. Who's there? Not your parents.

How many dead babies does it take to fill a bathtub? 17.

Two scientists walk into a bar. The first one says, "I'll have some H20" and the second one says, "I'll have some H20 too." The second scientist dies after drinking hydrogen peroxide.

what did batman say to robin before they got into the batmibile "get in the batmoblie"

What does andy and burger king have in common? Nothing, thats why she is now banging josh!

Your momma went to the gym, because she is fat.

why was 6 afraid of 7? because he's a pussy.

Why did the girl go to the hospital? She had an asthma attack.

i like it in the mouth

Women's rights

Whats green, lies in a ditch, and is covered in cookie crumbs? A girl scout that got hit by a car

Me Neither.

how did the jewish man die He had a fatal hard attack

What did the sick kid say to Make a Wish foundation? To get better

What does one call black men pushing a car up a hill? Black Car. What does one call white men pushing a car up a hill? White Car. What does one call Mexicans pushing a car up a hill? Grand Theft Auto

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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