- Anti Joke

What do you do if you see a man on the street with a pineapple up his bum? Take him to the hospital to have the pineapple removed professionally. It could be potentially dangerous for his health.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a bomb that explodes in 3 seconds inside your apple.

What's the difference between a smashed watermelon and a dead black person? One is a minor slip of the hands and the other is a fatal accident involving a human being.

What did the sheep say to the Commonwealth Committee on September 11 2001? Baabaaabaaaahhh

You've been in robotics too long if you start talking to your tools. You've been in there way too long if they start talking back!

What did one friend say on his friend's myspace page? You need a Facebook

Cosmopolitan magazine releases an issue without any sex tips.

What did the blondes left leg say to her right leg? Nothing they haven't met yet.

How many surrealists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Yarn

Knock knock Who's there? You Whoa...

when life gives you lemons your like wait how did i get these lemons??

Why did the penis enter the vagina? They were trying for a baby

Roses are white Violets are black I'm colorblind That is sad

sean punches bryce in the face, sean then says ow you just punched me in the face. that hurt

What do Michael Jackson and Donkey Kong have in common? They're both famous.

A man walked into his house to find that his wife was cheating on him with another man. He was furious, and killed himself

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

What do you do if you see a man on the street with a pineapple up his bum? Take him to the hospital to have the pineapple removed professionally. It could be potentially dangerous for his health.

What happened after the lawer jumped off the bridge? His family mourned his loss for years.

what is worse than throwing a dead baby off a cliff? catching one with a pitchfork!!!!

I'm at my grandmothers house right now

The Awkward moment when the world doesn't end

What did the woman get for her 18th birthday? Stabbed to death.