why do my feet smell so bad? because i havent washed them for 5 days

I agree Nero, we agree there, but let me ask you, why did you have the deep desire to create such a society before? You managed to do so as a teen, you wanted to help others, you put them before yourself, you where far more loyal to them, than they ever where to you. What motivated you then to sacrifice so much, where is that strength today?

What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong is an astronaut. Michael Jackson abuses little kids.

Why wasn't the black woman allowed on the bus? It was rush hour and the bus was full.

Q: A blonde, a red-head, and a brunette all jump off the bridge at the same time. Who hits the ground first? A: As stated by Sir Isaac Newton's third law of gravitation, all three fall to their deaths at the exact same time because the velocity of a falling object is unaffected by the mass of that object... or their hair colour. Idiot.

what do you call a black man with a job? dont know, has never happened.

Why did the gang jump a man for his blue jeep? Answer The gang wanted a blue jeep.

Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Your doorbell is broken.

Hail Heetluh

How do you stop a baby alien from crying? Watch what its mother does to soothe it and then try and copy that.

The seven dwarves sat around the house feeling Grumpy, so Grumpy left.

whos district champs not JM

what did god say when we made his first nigga oops i acidenlty burnt it

When life throws you lemons, duck.

What did the transvestite say to the fox? 'scuse me, you've got something on your shoe.

What do you call a man who's arms have been amputated? It doesn't matter, he won't be able to pick up the phone.

So, theoretically, if we controlled the media, what would be different then?

Q: Why wouldn't the other kids play with Timmy at recess? A: Because he was a burn victim and had no face.

What's funny about a small child with no arms, no legs? Nothing.. Nothing at all.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have PTSD. Time to kill myself.

Safe sex MR

You know what makes me smile? Face muscles

identical jokes get different votes.

Two Jewish men walk into a bar...just kidding it was a gas chamber.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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