A have a black guy in my family tree. He married my cousin a few years back

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What happened when the man lost his sandwich? He couldnt eat.

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What did the man at the haberdashery say? Six and seven-eighths, bub, six and seven-eighths.

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What happened to jimmy when he stepped on a rusty nail? He died of of tetanus.

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Why did the man dig his nose? because everyone digs their nose

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Why was Mrs. Clause mad at Santa Clause? Because he was hanging out with three hoes, Ho, Ho, and Ho

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A woman walks into a bar. Since having equal rights, she too falls unconcious..... Several men walk toward the bar

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Q. What's green, has wheels and flies? A. A garbage truck.

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What's the difference between men and coca-cola? I don't like coca-cola

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Q. What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A. Where's my tractor?

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whats the difference between a bird and a turtle? they can both fly but the turtle cant

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Once upon a time, there was this guy. He lived a good life and then died.

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What is worse then finding repeated jokes on anti jokes? finding a womr in your apple

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http://anti-joke.com/anti-joke/popular/a-paper-cut-is-a-trees-last-revenge

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A pizza has cheese on it.

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So a pirate walks into a bar. He sits down and orders a drink. The bartender then looks down and realizes that the pirate has a steering wheel on his penis. "Sir, are you aware that you have a steering wheel on your penis?" the bartender asks. "Arrrrrrr! It's driving me crazy! I just woke up one day and it was there!" The pirate replied. "Well you should probably get that checked out soon, it looks like it could be very harmful to your health and slightly uncomfortable. Not to mention your penis is out in the open." "You are right, what was I thinking?" The pirate agreed. He proceeded to get his friend to drive him to a hospital, for drinking and driving is not safe, and steering wheels on penises are not healthy.

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There once was a man from Peru. Who dreamed he was eating his shoe. I shot him in the head. With a bullet made of lead. And now he's dead. No more shoe ingestion

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What is the difference between 100 dead babies and a Ferrari? I ain't got a Ferrari in my car.

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How do you teach a black guy to swim? You sign him up for swimming lessons.

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- Why Justin Bieber can't login to Facebook? - Because he forgot the password.

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Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

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yo mamma so fat that when she goes out in high heels she comes back in flip flops

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A woman leaves the kitchen.

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A potato walked into a bar and ordered a large bowl of french fries

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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