Q. What's green, has wheels and flies? A. A garbage truck.

Why did the man dig his nose? because everyone digs their nose

What happened to jimmy when he stepped on a rusty nail? He died of of tetanus.

Why was Mrs. Clause mad at Santa Clause? Because he was hanging out with three hoes, Ho, Ho, and Ho

What's the difference between men and coca-cola? I don't like coca-cola

A woman walks into a bar. Since having equal rights, she too falls unconcious..... Several men walk toward the bar

Q. What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A. Where's my tractor?

Once upon a time, there was this guy. He lived a good life and then died.

whats the difference between a bird and a turtle? they can both fly but the turtle cant

What is worse then finding repeated jokes on anti jokes? finding a womr in your apple

what happened to the baseball player who couldnt throw? he was very unsuccessful, as throwing is the most important skill of the game

There once was a man from Peru. Who dreamed he was eating his shoe. I shot him in the head. With a bullet made of lead. And now he's dead. No more shoe ingestion

So a pirate walks into a bar. He sits down and orders a drink. The bartender then looks down and realizes that the pirate has a steering wheel on his penis. "Sir, are you aware that you have a steering wheel on your penis?" the bartender asks. "Arrrrrrr! It's driving me crazy! I just woke up one day and it was there!" The pirate replied. "Well you should probably get that checked out soon, it looks like it could be very harmful to your health and slightly uncomfortable. Not to mention your penis is out in the open." "You are right, what was I thinking?" The pirate agreed. He proceeded to get his friend to drive him to a hospital, for drinking and driving is not safe, and steering wheels on penises are not healthy.

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A pizza has cheese on it.

http://anti-joke.com/anti-joke/popular/a-paper-cut-is-a-trees-last-revenge

How do you teach a black guy to swim? You sign him up for swimming lessons.

What is the difference between 100 dead babies and a Ferrari? I ain't got a Ferrari in my car.

- Why Justin Bieber can't login to Facebook? - Because he forgot the password.

Why was 9 afraid of 10 because 10 was a registered sex offender

Roses are red, Violets are blue when I saw you what the heel are you

Do you want to hear a joke?!?!?!?!?!?! A happy orphan

What's blue and smells like red paint. ............blue paint.

yo mamma so fat that when she goes out in high heels she comes back in flip flops

A potato walked into a bar and ordered a large bowl of french fries

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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