One man says to another "Hey you have banana in your ears." The other man replies "I can't hear you, I have bananas in my ears."

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What's brown and sticky? Poo.

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Why didn't the woman cook dinner for her husband? She had to work late.

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Why was Rodney afraid of Chung Lee? Because Chung Lee is an intimidating person, capable of literally ripping your face off.

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What's worse then having gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe? Having a stick poked in your eye. What's worse then having a stick poked in your eye? Having a nail go through your foot. What's worse then having a nail go through your foot? Having a stick poked in your eye and a nail going through your foot.

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Your momma's so fat: She feels excluded by mainstream clothing outlets.

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Why did little Suzie spill her drink? Since birth, she has lacked a jaw.

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why did the building fall down the terrorists came back

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Why did Alex die? He choked on a semi truck

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A black van approaches a small boy. The boy gets in the van, and the van drives away.

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Why is that man such a perv? I don't know. Ever since I let him see my boobs, he has had this undying obsession with sex. So, I guess that, as society would classify him, he is a sex addict. He will do anything for it, even if he needs a man to get it. I feel terrible about starting his obsession, and plan to take him to therapy next week for the sake of his health.

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Because you killed my Llama. He was my best-friend.

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What did the lamp say to the pencil? Nothing. Lamps and pencils are inanimate objects and are also non sentient so therefore are incapable of talking or listening or having any emotions.

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Friends are like trees, They fall down if you hit them several times with an axe.

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Whats as flat as a pancake and alive Ya nan being flattened by a truck on the motorway

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Q: what's better than ice cream A: not having aids

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How many fat Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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Whats funnier than 2 dead babies? Seinfeld, and I hate Seinfeld.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 6 is a homophobe and 7 is a little fruity.

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Why did Devon move out of his mom's house? His mom beats him.

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Why did Jenny fail her driving test? She was hit by a train.

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A man goes to the hospital he says to the doctor while poking his leg it hurts here. Then he pokes his arm and here. Then his head and here. "Yes" the doctor says you've broken your finger.

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Where did Susie go when the bomb went of? Everywhere?

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What did the three sixteen year old boys do to the homeless man late at night? Wished him a happy birthday and gave him a meal

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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