Knock Knock Who's there? Chinese. What? Knock Knock.

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Why did the gorilla fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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i tried logging into my ipad. turns out, it was an etch a sketch, and i dont own an ipad. also, im out of vodka.

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The probability of someone watching you is proportional to the stupidity of your action

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How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

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Why did Bob get off the swing? Because he was done.

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Lance Armstrong gets on a bike

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My name is Jeff

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How do you get girls to watch a crappy movie? Tell them Taylor Lautner is in it.

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Whats white and can't climb a tree? A refrigerator

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A man walks into the doctor's office and says "I'm not feeling to good doc." and the doctor says "Thats because you have a fatal brain tumor and probably don't have too long to live."

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who should be competing in the paralympics? Brent the retard!

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There was a black and white spotted dog named Louis. Why did they call her that? Because, that's what they named her.

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Did you hear about Big Chief Running Water? Probably not. Indoor plumbing was invented after Europeans murdered his ancestors.

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How do you hide an Elephant? You paint it's toenails pink and put it in a strawberry patch. Have you ever seen an elephant in a strawberry patch.? It must work pretty well then!!

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What do you call a muffin with frosting? A cupcake

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My son won the lottery. I shot him so I could have the money.

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A black man and a mexican jump of a building to see who hits the ground first. Who wins? Society.

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Whats black and white and musty? A nuns pussy because it never gets used.

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Why is little johnny sad? He won the lottery but then found out the next day he had cancer and cried in a corner.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen. Its was her funeral

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why did the chicken cross the road? to spend the night with his friend.

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A blonde lady has a sore throat. Her colleague tells her that whenever she has a sore throat, she performs oral sex on her husband and swallows, and this cures the problem. The next day, the blonde comes into work. The colleague asks if she followed her advice, and the blonde says yes and it worked. The blonde also passes a message from her boyfriend thanking her colleague for the suggestion. The two sets of spouses eventually became close friends and were godparents to each others' children.

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Why was the little boy crying? Because his older brother was forcing him to pee on an electrical socket.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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