Two doctors were performing open heart surgery on a 54-year old woman. The surgery was a success, and she is now living comfortably in Portland, OR. She enjoys sweet tea.

thumb_up thumb_down

what do u call a black persons face? a black persons face...

thumb_up thumb_down

If I could rearrange the letters of the alphabet.... dklaujeo bnvalue doiandkluq!!

thumb_up thumb_down

He--Hey guys

thumb_up thumb_down

All these jokes are so much funnier when I read them during class, laughing my ass off and everybody's looking at me like I'm retarded

thumb_up thumb_down

I may have Alzheimer's. But at least I don't have Alzheimer's.

thumb_up thumb_down

2 persons in an elevator then, one guy says: dude! smells like your sister! and the other guy is not there

thumb_up thumb_down

A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

thumb_up thumb_down

What do you call a person who is black? A black person.

thumb_up thumb_down

Knock Knock .... Knock Knock .... Pum Pum Pum .... LAPD! open the door!

thumb_up thumb_down

How many pupils does the teacher have? 2.

thumb_up thumb_down

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down

Its easy they said, just type your text below they said, so I did

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had very recentley made his escape from a nearby farm, of which was owned by a man close to dying of a Rhabdoid Tumor. His family was in mourn.

thumb_up thumb_down

Your adopted.....

thumb_up thumb_down

What do you call a black man and an Asian at a school? Two hard-working, dedicated teachers.

thumb_up thumb_down

GONNA

thumb_up thumb_down

how much blondes does it take to fix a light bulb 1 to buy the bulb 2 to put it up and 25 to think about what it does

thumb_up thumb_down

Q. Knock Knock A. Whose there? Q. how am i supposed to know why don't you answer it and find out you dumb ass! gosh.... people and their common sense these days!!

thumb_up thumb_down

Roses are red, Violets are blue, We have condoms, But we didn't use them with you. You were DP'd, Now you have STD.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

3 men in a boat One day there were a American, Mexican, and a Chinese men in a boat. The Chinese man threw over a fortune cookie and said we have to many of these in our country. The Mexican threw over a taco and said we have to many of these in our country. The American threw over the Mexican and said we have to many of these in our country. The End

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How do you kill a blonde? Shoot her repeatedly in the face and then slit her throat.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How do you tell the difference between a white family, and an albino black family? The albino black family suffers from a lack of pigmentation, while the white family just has a naturally pale skintone.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops