Why did the chicken cross the road? It had places to be

What does a baby and a bowling ball share in common? They both displace a similar amount of water.

What do Ash Ketchum and Peter Francis Geraci have in common? Absolutely nothing.

Why did the man eat the cheese? because the man was a mouse

What did the librarian say to the three black men in the library? Nothing. Those three men were Harvard graduates and were very respective of libraries, and thier policies.

What does a homeless man get for Valentines Day? Divorce papers

Once a upon of time, there was a very big kangaroo named Jake. Well one day Jake was eating some food when suddenly a bunch of humans came and saw him. One human name Willie went over to take some pictures of the animal. The Jake ran away.

What is a life without options.... an optionless life

Why did 'Mister Love' get arrested? Clue: One of the most ironic things ever You can guess

- Hey, guess how many people are dead in that cemetery? - I don't know. How many? - All of them.

what do jews like the most? money, because they're all greedy fat nosed cunts

How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb? One, its not a difficult task.

why did the man buy kool aid? because it was on sale and he was thirsty

how many times did lucy's mom drop her baby on its head? none, her mom died giving birth.....

Q. Why did the triceratops die? A. A giant meteor hit him.

my uncle used to tickle me.. he's in prison for child abuse

I used to be an adventurer like you but then i grew old and i never took i single injury unlike my brother he took an arrow to the knee or so he says i asked him to show me and he was all defensive like "whoa man i don't need to prove anything." so i think he's lieing

Do you speak alien? Hola.

What's red and round? A red and round solid.

roses are red FACT violets are blue FACT this ryhm is boring how about you FACT

Why do Native Americans own Casinos? Because it's a very profitable business situation.

how do you kill a rat skin it and feed it to your child and wait till it shits then when it shits feed it to your dog then when it shits then microwave it and shove the smelly liquid remains up your ass.

A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

Nuclear Bombs are bad. But erections are good.......as long as they are stroked

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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