why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the monkey

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Do you want icecream, Björn?

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Person 1:"Knock Knock" Person 2: Whos there.... Wait why did you literally say the words "Knock Knock" Person 1: I have no idea

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What's funnier than throwing a baby off a bridge? Everything, if you think that's funny, you're a terrible person.

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What do you call a room full of jewish women with yeast infections? The waiting room of a gynecologists office, potentially in some sort of Jewish district

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Q: What would you do if i pushed you down the stairs A: I would suffer from serious head injuries thus filling you with guilt for performing such a deed.

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Nickleback.

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"Guess what I was doing in my room last night with the door closed with my hand?" "Please don't say what I think you're going to say" "What? I was just cleaning my room."

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A: Knock Knock B: Come in A: Come in Who B: Your Mum...

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You'er moma is so stupied that she climbed over the glass window to see what on the other side

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What's the difference between a duck?

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What's the difference between an X-box and Michael Jackson? One is an inanimate object and the other is a human being.

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Why did the frog die? He had AIDS

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Yo momma is so fat when she sat on the i pod she made the i pad!

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? However many needed.

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Wanna hear a joke? women's rights. jaye clenton is a fag.

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Whats worse than getting raped by a cow? Getting raped by two cows.

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Steven Hawking walks into a bar. Steven Hawking is disabled from the neck down. I lied.

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He decided to sail to Portland. He cast off and was never seen again.

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What do you call a black guy that has a big white coat, an assortment of knives and a couple of women working for him? A doctor

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Q. Why did the boy throw up on the bus? A. All his friends around him died in the accident

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What did a policeman say to his belly? Nothing. Because he knows his belly is incapable of speech.

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Once a upon a midnight haven. Along came a cow name Mr. Maven. For they say the cow was very lucky. But oh what a day for something very mucky. Oh ye the coming of Mr. Maven and his milk. And for every cereal there will be silk. But wait isn't Mr. Maven a guy? How can you milk him even if you try? I don't know, just sounds cool.

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A horse walks into a bar, and orders a drink. The bartender is amazed at first, but then remembers that he just did acid.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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