Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 went to war and when he came back, he was really messed up. One day he took 2 into a dark alley and beat him up really badly. Now, it's not just 6 who is afraid, but everyone.

Loner.

Your mom is so fat, that last night after reading and edition of Cosmo, she skipped dinner and cried herself to sleep due to her inability to live up to such an unrealistic feminine stereotype.

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

A dyslexic canadian walks into an arab

What do an octopus and a cat have in common? They are both multicellular organisms that are living creatures, and therefore are both sentient and can perform simple tasks and make simple decisions.

A man walks into a bar. It was a metal bar. He cracked his skull and died in the hospital shorty afterward.

This is one LONG empty space isn't it?

what did the indians give the pilgrims? syphylis

did you know helen keller had a swingset? neither did she

What do you call a black man? Black

Why didn't the monkey cross the road? He saw the chicken get run over.

What happened when a Black man ran into a white supremacist? They exchanged insurance information

How does Lady Gaga like her meat? As a dress.

What does a shortstop do when the ball is by third base? He leaves the field to go to the hospital, his little sister just had a heart attack.

How many electricians does it take to change a lightbulb? One.

What separates man from animal? Divorce.

A teenager decides to stay home instead of go to college. His parents are fine with his choice since he is mentally ill.

What crime does a tree commit in order to be sent to prison? Trees on.

What's green, yellow, and red? A traffic light

So three Irish guys walk out of a bar

The lion swallowed his pride.

A black man and his mexican friend walk into a bar. The black man orders a drink and the mexican gets soda. He is the designated driver

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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