How do you get a one armed man out of a tree? you throw a fridge at him

Why is six afraid of seven? Seven is a rapist.

what is red and looks like a bucket? A red bucket Waht is blue and looks like a bucket? (99% of the time they will say "a blue bucket") No, a red bucket in disguise!

what do you call a joke that makes no sense? a joke that makes no sense

Why couldn't the prostitute give a proper blow job..... She had no lips

Roses are red Violets are blue I forgot to go to the bathroom

What is Debbie short for? She has no legs.

Cows are land manatees.

You know what's really long? The bread lines in Africa

How many Frenchmen does it take to surrender? Probably just one.

why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a loaf of bread

Z.

Roses are red, violets are blue, so is my face, I'm constipated

What's worse than a Holocaust in your apple? What.

Q: why did Suzie drop her ice cream? A: because she got hit by a bus.. Q:knock knock who's there? A: not Suzie

what did the caterpillar say to the butterfly? Im gonna turn into you.

A lady was walking to the grocery store as she was walking she saw a old lady with a dog behind them where two black merses and about 200 women behind the merses. The lady Rushes over and ask '' Maim i am sorry to bother you but i would like to know who you lost and how?'' The old lady paused for a minute and awnsered '' I lost my husband and mother in law, Well My husband had just walked in to the house and my new dog went and ferousiously atacted him my mother in law had been living with us at the time she the jumped in and tried to help him They both died because of blood loss'' The lady looked at her with simpathy and thought i feel sorry for her husband and his mother she then asked '' Can i barrow your dog'' the old lady looked puzzled and said '' Get in line '' The lady walked to the end of the line as the dog was Passed to a women and taken home then passed back. When the women got her turn she thought do i want to kill my husband then she thought yes

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, It's still in its pen.

Why was Abraham Lincolin President. He was elected by the people of the united states.

Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Our experimental treatment for Anterograde amnesia has failed. I will inform your family.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, nor does the chicken because it's a chicken.

What do you get when you cross Justin Bieber with a chicken? Most likely some kind of singing human-chicken monster, although given the little research done on cross-species splicing, this is a highly improbable circumstance.

Two fish are swimming and hit a cement wall. One fish says Dam.

why am i sore i bummed a giraffe

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...