Its Erron, listen, we got to talk, I do not mind your pictures, but I am not going to call you because of that weird spot on your face, its just 101 basics here, I suggest you shut down the access to this site to the rest of your employees, this might get very personal.

"Have you got any Saturday jobs available?" "Yes"

Q:What's red and hurts your teeth? A:A brick

Covert trance, black Ops, and something I kinda made up myself. The first two are basically using suggestions without the victim being aware of it, that is how that famous bank robber that just asks nicely for all the cash and gets it succeeds. The other is tricking the "allmighty" subconcious and again, my own invention people claim its called "this and that", I know, because I coined most of the terms. Anyway, you put people into a deep state of trance, you tell them to take a step forward into the sea, and well, you actually led them down the top of a skyscraper or something fun... "Now... Suck on the lollipop I have between my, okay ill stop"

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread

There are two muffins in a oven, the first muffin is chocolate chip and the second muffin is blueberry.

What did the Black man get after a month's worth of manual labour? A reasonable wage, that was above the national minimum wage standard which states his and everyones right to a certain amount of money

What did the limp dick say to the vagina? Is that rash contagious?

A chicken crosses the road as a car comes by. The driver pumps the brakes and stops the car just before hitting the chicken. The chicken crosses the road safely. Onward, my noble steed !

How do you say vampire in spanish? Vampiro.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it died.

101 ways to annoy people 1.) lying about having a 101 ways to annoy people

Knock, knock. Who's there? HIVs.

Stop with the 9/11 jokes guys. They're just plane stupid.

whats worse than falling off of your bike? thats as bad as it gets,try to think of something else

What do you call a bunch of mexicans jumping out of a truck a family with not alot of money to afford a car so they are forced to ride a truck that can barely fit them all

Why did the Jewish girl fall off the swing? Because Amon Goeth shot her in the head from his balcony with his rifle. --Amon Goeth's friend

stuarts mum

What did one Dentist say to the other? You are fat.

What did the ethiopian give his wife for her birthday? HIV

What did the black guy say to the slave driver. Nothing, slavery no longer exists.

Q. Why did the 8 year old girl scream and cry when she was raped? A. I no idea either. I drugged her and taped her mouth closed.

Whats the same about a Mole and an Eagle? They both live underground, I lied about the Eagle.

Q:Why did the bunny run up the hill? A:Because he can't run under it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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