Hey you wanna hear a joke? Sure! Well first, do you want part of my sandwich? No thanks.........Are you going to tell your joke? Joke? Um sure. I didn't know I was telling one. Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have Alzheimer's. Would you like part of my sandwich?

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HAHA i just read a joke!!! and i liked it! :D to bad you dont know what page it was on... wanna know?... YOUR..... #1 LALALA

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A giraffe walks into a bar.... just kidding, a giraffe wouldnt fit in a bar.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Interrupting Pessimist. Interrupting Pessi- Slavery.

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Knock Knock JUST OPEN THE FLIPPIN DOOR ALREADY! I DON"T NEED YOU TO KNOCK AND INTRODUCE YOURSELF EVERY TIME YOU COME TO MY HOUSE!!! Jeez...seriously

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What do you do if there's a rabid elephant chasing behind you, a vicious jaguar to your right, a rearing horse to your left, and a bloodthirsty lion in front of you? Innoculate yourself with a rabies vaccine, prod the jaguar on the nose with a stick (they hate that and will probably flee as a result), speak softly and calmly to the horse and encourage the lion to go for the elephant instead of you. You will probably still die as a combined result of mauling and trampling, and it's unlikely that you'll have two rabies vaccines to hand by chance for such situations, but your chances of survival will be minimally improved.

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Why will this joke be the most hated? Because it sucks

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead

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What starts with f and end in uck Firetruck

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if your were a slu* what would you do dance on a pole or get a tattoo

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Your grandma and your mom drove of a cliff, who survived? Both of them they didn't drive off a cliff

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Did u hear about the fire at the circus? 12 people died.

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So does Blake

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Dad, why are we Swedish? Because antilopes and the butterfly effect son.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I'm extremely unstable. And So are you.

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Why was the blonde in the library? Because she was committed to her studies and was getting ready for a test.

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what was the last pizza place the twin towers ordered from? Domino's

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What's worse than someone who thinks Sting is a nice guy? Sting.

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Why was the couple in the waiting room crying? Because their son was diagnosed of AIDS and will probably not live into his twenties.

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What do you do with a dog with no legs? Take it for a drag.

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*DRRRRIN* Finally someone uses the doorbell.

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what did the man say to his dog? sex. -teagan doherty

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There's a black, afghan, and a rhabi. Which one is Obama?

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Why was bobby late for school? Because he drove off a bridge.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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