Why was the black man running? he was participating in race for the cure, a charity event where all proceeds go to breast cancer awareness.

thumb_up thumb_down

There were three men in a race: Crap, Manners, and Shut Up. During the race, Crap fell and Manners stopped to pick him up, Shut Up kept on speeding. The police stopped him. Here is there converstation: Police 1: Whats your name? Shut Up: Shut Up Police 2: Wheres your manners? Shut Up: Back there picking up crap.

thumb_up thumb_down

A Polar Bear walks into a bar and says to the barman: "Barman! Give me a whiskey and ............................................................coke." The barman says: "Why the big pause?" to which the Polar bear replies: "Well uhm my father had big paws"

thumb_up thumb_down

Two men are making sandwiches, one man is spreading peanut butter over the bread and the other man is spreading honey and Italian raspberry jam over rye bread. the man with the peanut butter sandwich looks over and says "HEY, where did you get the rye bread?" and the man with the rye bread says "well my wife made it yesterday and I would be delighted if you come over for some tea, and tried some of my wife's homemade rye bread".

thumb_up thumb_down

What do Batman and Harry Potter have in common? Their parents are dead.

thumb_up thumb_down

What do you call an asian pilot? A pilot you racist bastard

thumb_up thumb_down

What do you call a Puerto Rican, a Blonde, and an African woman in a taxi cab? Three people who happen to be traveling to the same location at the same point in time.

thumb_up thumb_down

How do you confuse a bus driver? Go invisible and throw bananas at him

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the fat man buy at Mcdonalds? A unicorn

thumb_up thumb_down

Q. Why did the Chineese man eat a banana? A. He was hungry, and he was craving a banana.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the clown fall out of the helicopter?? Gravity

thumb_up thumb_down

A squirrel runs into a bar and out-runs the bartender to get some assorted nuts on the table then runs out of the bar

thumb_up thumb_down

Once upon of time there was a chicken. It crossed the road and everybody made fun of him. The End

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the clam say to the scuba diver? FUCK MAN! STOP TOUCHING MY JEWELS! WOULD YOU WANT ME TO JUST RIP YOURS AND TAKE THEM WITH ME!

thumb_up thumb_down

Here is an opposite. Black Santa Claus.

thumb_up thumb_down

Whats has no comedic value? A brick

thumb_up thumb_down

Why can't Tommy ride his bicycle? Because Tommys' bike has a missing pedal.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the girl fall of the swing? I hit her with an axe.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the boy drop the ice cream? Because he had a seizure.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Mam: Wanna hear a joke about my penis?... nevermind, it's to long. Woman: wanna hear a joke about my vagina?... nevermind, u wouldn't get it.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he thought he saw a dangerous predator in the area and crossed the road in an attempt to flee the dangerous situation.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you call a black man stealing your tv? A thief

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q: What did the boy say to his mum when he saw a Lion A: Hey mum that's a Lion

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the girl go fishing? Because she was the bait

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops