A: What did the orphan get for christmas? Q: Nothing she doesn't have any parents

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She didn't have arms.

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Once upon a time, A lonely man was living in the woods. He died of exhaustion, dehydration, starvation, and bacterial infection. The end. Once upon a time, Another lonely man was living in the woods. He built a house, made a well, made a farm, got married, had kids, and had a wonderful life. The end.

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What do the world and jelly beans have in common? Nothing.

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What do you call a guy eating a sandwich? Whatever his name is.

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whats your moms inside look like nick because all there is is fat

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Moo! I'm a goat!

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Why did the man have a hard time trying to open the door? The door was locked

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A Black guy and a Jewish guy walk into a bar. What does the black guy say to the Jew? "Hi".

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Teacher- And that is why the Pythagorean theorem only works for RIGHT triangles. Any questions? Student- I like grapes.

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Why couldnt the black guy swim? He couldn't swim because he had no parental figures growing up. His dad was part of a gang and his mom was a crack addict. He had noone to teach him how to swim.

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How do you get a kid to shut up? You ducttape his mouth,legs, and arms and throw him in a pit

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock Knock "Who's there?" Not Sally!

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I AM SATAN, YOU SHALL LOVE ME BEFORE EVERYBODY ELSE! YOU SHALL STONE THY INSOLENT CHILDREN! THY SHALL R*PE AND KILL IN MY NAME! YOU SHALL HANG MY SON ON THE CROSS WHICH I SACRIFICED BECAUSE HE IS IMMORTAL/BECAUSE I LOVE YOU? "Moral" "Man": Joke is on you, who do you think I am, God?

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What happens if a girl punches a guy? A white man in prison, convicted of sexual assault.

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How do you make a dead baby float? Ice cream, root beer, and a dead baby.

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How to condom style ayyyyyy sexy horsey how how how how how to condom style

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to KFC for his job interview

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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'Dyslexic man walks into a bar... and orders a pint

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Whats black and white and eats like horse? A zebra.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding an apple in your worm.

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Who enslaves small people and forces them to work in his factory all year round in ridiculous outfits. Santa

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What did the doctor say to the young boy? We only planned on a annual checkup but have discovered that your and aids baby and only have 3 days to live. Tell your family members goodbye you'll be on life support in the next couple hours.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops