So a black man steals a bike Because it was unlocked, and that was just poor planning.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

A man sees another man standing at the edge of a tall bridge looking down. Man: Don't jump! No one wants you to die. You have your whole life to live and I'm sure you will find happiness somewhere. I was once in the same position as you, questioning if god really wanted me on this earth at all. But I decided to make something of myself and now I am a very successful business man. You can do the same if you just put your mind to it and put your troubles behind you. Other man: I was just admiring the view.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

your mom is so stupid she has a low iq

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Your mom is so stupid she has to get homeschooled for college!

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Roses are red, Facebook is blue, no mutual friends, WHO THE HELL ARE YOU!?!?

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was attached to a bomb filled with spoons

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What did the black man do when his car was rear-ended? He exchanged insurance information with the other driver.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Adele Gordon walks into a bar. The bartender says 'Why the long face?' Because she is a horse lol.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Doctor, I've caught a cold. Take a Halls.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

A man walks into a bar. He drinks.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

knock knock whos there i dont know. go look

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Dan was friends with Dick. Dick likes to give massages to Dan. Dan's favorite is Dickie's special mixture. He will remember Dick, his favorite personal assisatant for life. CREEPER

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Two condoms walk into a gay bar. The people in the bar are perplexed that two inanimate objects are capable of locomotion.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

A man walks into a bar. It turns out he's an alcoholic, and he goes home and beats his wife.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What do you get when Johnson cooks toast? Shit toast.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Why couldn't the kitten drink its milk? Because his face was stapled to the wall.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Once upon a time, there was a man. He was black. The end.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Roses are Red. Violets are Blue. Faces like yours belong in the Zoo. Don't be mad I will be there too. Not in the gate but laughing at you.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

I have a joke that involves a duck. Can you guess what it is? If not, then.......uh...........sorry.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Do you want to hear a joke, Women's rights

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What has eyes but can't see? Helen Keller. What has ears but can't hear? A field of corn.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

There were three guy's caught trespassing on a farmers land. The farmer said he wont kill them if they did what they were told, he told everyone to pick one fruit. The 1st guy came to him with grapes. The farmer told him to shove it up his butt so he did, the 2nd guy came to the farmer with orange, the farmer told him to shove them up his butt but the guy kept laughing, the farmer got angry and snapped whats so funny? My buddy over over there is picking watermelons.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

HahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhaahhahahahhahahaahhahahaahhahahahahahahhaahhahaahhahahahaahhahaahahaHahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhaahhahahahhahahaahhahahaahhahahahahahahhaahhahaahhahahahaahhahaahahaHahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhaahhahahahhahahaahhahahaahhahahahahahahhaahhahaahhahahahaahhahaahahaHahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhaahhahahahhahahaahhahahaahhahahahahahahhaahhahaahhahahahaahhahaahahaHahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhaahhahahahhahahaahhahahaahhahahahahahahhaahhahaahhahahahaahhahaahahaHahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhaahhahahahhahahaahhahahaahhahahahahahahhaahhahaahhahahahaahhahaahahaHahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhaahhahahahhahahaahhahahaahhahahahahahahhaahhahaahhahahahaahhahaahahaHahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhaahhahahahhahahaahhahahaahhahahahahahahhaahhahaahhahahahaahhahaahaha - Louis

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What's big, red, and eats rocks? A big, red, rock-eater.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops