- Anti Joke

How many frogs does it take to change a light bulb None. Frogs lack the cranial capacity to change said lightbulb. If eventually by evolution they become smart enough to change lightbulbs, they may learn to handle machinery and pose a real threat to humans.

a man reads his wife a poem "roses are red, violets are blue, and I love you." the wife talks to her brother asking why he changed the poem he said men do that cause they love you. later that night she got pregnant.

What happens when a black man dies in France? A funeral procession.

4 out of 4 questions. You want to cross the lake, but alligators live in that river. How do you get across? The alligators aren't there. They're all at the lion king's meeting.

"Your invited!" "Invited to what?" "I can't tell but everybody you know." " He he."

Steven Hawking walks into a bar. That is highly improbable, due to the fact he is in a wheelchair.

Yo momma so stupid, she had you.

Q: What is tall, white, and shaped like a house? A: a tall white man, if you break his limbs and twist them into the rectangular shape of a house.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know. Chickens are incapable of communicating with humans and thus the intent of the chicken can only be speculated.

A man went to his doctor and said, "Doctor, every time I hit my hand with a hammer, it hurts!" Then both him and his doctor died; so it didn't matter.

What did Dr. Pepper say to Sprite? I'm a Doctor.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Did you hear about that superman guy? He died.

If Jonny has 300 pies and eats 299 pies what is left for Jonny? DIABETES

A man orders chinese food. His wife says "Honey, where's the cat?"

knock knock whos there? jim okay come in.

A guy named John wanted to finish his life. Now he is dead

One day a priest walked into a prison to bring lost souls to the Lord.....Not his best idea.

what do you call postman pat after he's retired? Pat.

How do you kill off a zombie apocalypse? Laser vision

Who ya gonna call? ... Whoever you need to talk to at the current time.

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

what kind of mexicans are NOT in the U.S. -legal

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?" The horse says "I have Cancer."