why did the boy get hit by a bus because he had ice cream.

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whats worse, being kicked in the balls or giving birth? losing an arm to meningitis

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

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I have sexdaily. I mean dyslexic. Fcuk!

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A horse walks into a bar gets shot then carried away in a helicopter

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How did the black man get into college? A mop.

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What did the blond say when she got into a car crash? Nothing, she died.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a cucumber? You can't gas a cucumber.

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a kid named austin walks into school and gets kicked in the nuts byyy

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Obamacare

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why was the black man blind? because he was black.

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Why did the blond fail her math test? Because she got all the questions wrong.

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Whats green and turns red at the push of a button A frog in a blender

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baskets

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead

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What's three times as dangerous than a war? Three wars.

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what do ninjas and gay people have in common... if you eat them they will no longer be alive

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Adam Turkolowoskiaklfadjufsdjksbgsgsafafdsg

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Q: What do you call it when you get shot in the face 20 times with a shotgun? A:Nothing, you're dead. Q:What do we call it when you get shot 20 times with a shotgun? A: A blessing.

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why did the bird fall out of the tree? Earth's Gravitational pull

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why was the black guy running from the cops? i dont know either

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You know what makes me smile? Face muscles

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A baby seal walks into a club. He is immediately escorted out because babies are not allowed in clubs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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