Wanna hear a joke? 9-11

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Q.why did the woman die A.she left the refrigerator door open then left the kitchen

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What's black, white and re(a)d all over ? A penguin in a blender.

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A duck walks into a 7-11 and says "Give me some Chap-stick, and put it on my bill!" But the cash register attendee doesn't speak English and cannot understand him. He does, however, question whether his God is punishing him because, as all people know, Ducks cannot speak. However, this hallucination must be punishment for a horrid misdeed. The employee breaks down into tears and begins reciting a prayer. The duck, slightly miffed, walks out, pondering why he'd need Chap-stick anyway, since he has no lips.

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porn-hub

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why did suzy fall off the swing? she has no arms, knock knock who's there? Not suzy!

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roses are red, violets are blue, niggers are black and so is my poo

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog Woof.

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the holocaust

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Why was the African american pulled over in New Jersey? He was 17 and didn't have his red stickers.

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Why did the boy throw his clock out the window? After hours of waiting for the perfect victim, the boy spotted an elderly woman walking down the sidewalk. The clock barreled through the air, hitting the old woman on the head at extremely high speeds. She was immediately killed on contact.

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How did the old man feel when he couldn't have sex? Viagravated

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Two people walk into Israel. The first is shot on the spot. The second screams "I only have two pennies in my pocket!" Immediately he is raped by five Jews.

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Whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? I can cook a pizza.

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A women's opinion.

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Whats worst than stubbing your toe? The Holocaust.

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Why did a man get fired from the M&M store? He was color blind.

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The Rock: What is your name? Jeff: My name is... The Rock: IT DOESN'T MATTER WHAT YOUR NAME IS!

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what do you call a bee that makes milk? A BOObee

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"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Dracula." "Dracula who?" He pulls his cape up to his face and says, "May the force be with you,"

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Why do leprechauns laugh when they run through the grass? Because it tickles their nuts.

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Hey, look over there! It's ur mom!

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A Black guy and a Mexican are in a car. Who is driving? The black guy. Its his car.

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How many alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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