How did the polack burn his hands on the stove? He placed his hands on the hot stove top burners not realizing they were hot.

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A. Treadmil

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What does a homeless man get for his birthday? 25 cents

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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Q: Why did the black man break into the house? A: Because he was poor and couldn't afford his daughters cancer treatment.

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On a scale of Casey Anthony to Jerry Sandusky how much do you like kids?

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Do you know the reason people like sleeping? It's because they have good dreams. Ooh la la.--

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"Hello, is this the Krusty Krab?" "No, this is Patrick."

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Why did the skeleton cross the road? Because Apocalypse arrived and dead people now have the ability to walk.

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What did the rock say to the other rock? Nothing, they had just met and both were very shy.

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What do Grant and Lee have in common? They're both black males

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When life throws you lemons, you probably have dyslexia

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Hey babies The holocaust called, they want their screams back.

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An American, a Mexican, and a Chinese person are in an airplane. The three of them ponder throwing someone out for a racist reason, but decide to fly to the destination.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know chickens are absent minded creatures that can aimlessly walk around.

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9/11

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A doctor walks into a bar. It's his day off and decides to celebrate after a long week of working.

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Whats worse than Justin Bieber's love life. My ass crack.

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roses r nice violet are fine all be the 6 and you be 9

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Why did they use the phone as a football? Because it was a phone-ball.

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What do you call a needy person? A person whos needs need needs.

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A: My dog has no nose. B: How does it smell? A: Terrible.

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What did the fat lady order at McDonalds? Nothing because she forgot here wallet at home.

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roses are red violets are blue some poems rhyme others don't.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops