A woman went outside for some fresh air.

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Q: A blonde, a red-head, and a brunette all jump off the bridge at the same time. Who hits the ground first? A: As stated by Sir Isaac Newton's third law of gravitation, all three fall to their deaths at the exact same time because the velocity of a falling object is unaffected by the mass of that object... or their hair colour. Idiot.

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Why are all black people fast? because all the slow ones are in jail.

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How many apple does it take to turn a fridge into a water buffalo? Yellow tactics because of the Minty fragrance

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Roses are grey Violets are gray Tulips are grey Lilly's are grey Dandelions are grey Daisy's are grey Daffodils are grey I am colour blind.

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How do you keep a dummy in suspense for 24 hours? Tell him his wife suffered from a severe concussion and that he'll have to wait until morning to see if she's okay

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Q. How are a bird and a turtle alike? A. They both fly. Except the turtle.

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A man walks up to a girl and says "Hello there" The girl doesn't respond because she has been deaf and blind for her entire life and doesn't know he is there. Potatoes.

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A ninja is walking down the street then he...finds a puppy a names him rex

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A giraffe walks into a bar.... just kidding, a giraffe wouldnt fit in a bar.

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What do Batman and Harry Potter have in common? Their parents are dead.

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What did the little girl with cancer get for Christmas? Chemotherapy.

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Why is there such a big box because there is some writing down here :)

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Roses are red my underwear is brown I just sharted my pants

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What do babies suck on? juice boxes!

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what did the boy say when his friend was having a panic attack? "don't panic!" rather earnestly in the hope that his friend's breathing returned to normal as panic attacks can be very uncomfortable and place too great a strain upon the cardio and respiratory functions.

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Why didn't Johnny walk to school this week? He was dead.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Anti-jokes

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why do black people hate whites? their is no light in the ghetto

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anti jokes r not funny, jk, thats a joke, i bet sum of u losers will like this cuz all of these jokes r horrible

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Whats the difference between a black man and a pizza? A pizza can feed a family of 5

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Who gives a shit? Justin Beiber.

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knock knock whose there? my penis.

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Your mom is so fat, that when she stepped on the scale she was disappointed with the number that appeared.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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