Your mom is so fat that she steps on the scale and sees a relatively large number compared to the rest of human society.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Interrupting doctor. Interupting doc- You have aids.

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What do you call a muslim flying a plane? A pilot

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What's worse than a baby dying of AIDS? It depends upon one's frame of reference. A family living in the US might consider the death of a baby by AIDS a horrible act by the gods. But to a similar family in sub-Saharan Africa, this might be a regular, albeit tragic occurrence.

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Polly went out for a fag. Then she was raped.

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Roses are car Violets are giraffe this poem makes no sense microwave

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Why was the homeless man begging for money? Because he needed money to buy liquer for his severe alcohol addiction that was slowly destroying his liver.

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Come on children, don't dawdle.

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Do you have emotional issues, ever have a really bad day and just wanna talk call this number (402-314-5287) < N1GGER

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Y u do dis?

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What did the Holocaust survivor say when asked about their memories in the deathcamps? A: I'd rather not think about it.

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Why doesn't Santa deliver gifts anymore? Because Santa died of a heart attack.

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What did the blind man say to the train conductor? Nothing. He was mute too.

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How do you get a baby into a bowl? Use a blender. How do you get the baby out of the bowl? Tortilla chips.

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So a moose walks into a grocery store and asks the clerk, who is a penguin, "Where's the bread?" And the penguin says "On isle three!" But, when the moose gets to isle three... The bread isn't there!

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Did you hear about the sale on the toyota cars from japan? if you can get it out of the water its free!

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How did the polar bear get the bottle of coke? He killed the little boy

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So heres a scenario. You and your twin brother are Siamese twins. You are straight and your brother is gay. Your bother has a friend come over. You only have one butt....

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What do you call a black guy who is a lifeguard An African American male who puts his safety before others

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A man walks into a bar in the morning. He is the bartender, and he works there.

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why did Jen fall off the swing? because she had no arms. knock knock who's there not Jen

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What happens when lady gaga and chris brown jump into the pool at the same exact time. They get wet

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How do you kill a blonde? Shoot her repeatedly in the face and then slit her throat.

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Priest: "Matt, will you take Senae to be your wife, your partner in life and your one true love? Will you cherish her friendship and love her today, tomorrow and forever? Will you trust and honor her, laugh with her and cry with her? Will you be faithful through good times and bad, in sickness and in health as long as you both shall live?" Matt: No

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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