What did the racist black man say to the white man? Nothing they both died in a car accident.

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canadians

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Where do 5 gay guys go????? One Direction.

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A pirate walks into a bar, and the bartender asks, "why do you have a wheel in your pants?"

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one day there was an ugly barnicle. he was SSSOOO ugly that everyone died the end -patrick

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? She was blind.

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a jewish man with a boner walks into a wall what does he hit first his cheek due to the fact he was looking at an attractive woman

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Where did Susie go when her town was bombed? Everywhere.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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there is a blonde, red head, and brunet held captive in afghanistan. The people say whats your last word to the red head, she says tornado... they turned and she escaped, they say to the brunet what is your last word, she says tsunami.. they turn and she escaped. They go to the blonde and say what is your last word, she says fire... she is then shot rapidly and she dies.

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Is it true that curiousity killed the cat? No, I hit it multiple times with a baseball bat

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4/20 is a holiday just like Christmas.. I lied you just get baked

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Why was Sally gone for her father's birthday? She went on a camping trip with her friends. Sally's friends were brutally murdered and she was kidnapped. The kidnapper cut off her arms and legs and left her in the middle of a suburban intersection late at night. The autopsy revealed that Sally died from blood loss from losing her limbs. It also revealed that she had contracted a fast growing tumor in her brain which would have most likely killed her within days of the murder anyway. Her family was living in the country illegally so her DNA did not reveal a computer file of her person. Her parents were not informed of her death for years because of this. When it was determined that the victim was the parents' daughter they were arrested for living in the country illegally and were not able to have a funeral.

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Why doesn't it rain on Sundays? It does.

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A man with a mustache enters your parents home to tell them you were kidnapped and taken to the pier 1 hour away. They leave and he goes upstairs to rape you for 1 hour. Never trust people with mustaches.

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How did the fat guy servive the plane crash??????? He bounced

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Bill and John are talking about types of cheese. The conversation drags on a bit and slowly changes topic. Bill says "I bet you I can bungy jump off a bridge". John chuckles before replying "I bet you can't". They go and find a bridge and Bill puts on his harness and ties himself to the side of the bridge. He throws himself off the edge and falls through the air screaming at the top of his voice. John cuts the bungy cord and Bill dies.

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What do you get when you cross a chicken and a fox? An eaten chicken.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she has no arms.

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A man walks into a bar. He has a beer and then goes home.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Pansies are flowers, And daisies are too.

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I dont usually get jokes, but when i do I get them.

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What do Ash Ketchum and Peter Francis Geraci have in common? Absolutely nothing.

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A seal walks into a club, It proceeds to maul customers and then makes its way back to the ocean where it lives.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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