hi anti joke

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Pansies are flowers, And daisies are too.

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A man walks into a bar. He has a beer and then goes home.

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A seal walks into a club, It proceeds to maul customers and then makes its way back to the ocean where it lives.

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What do you call a black person who just received a bachlors degree from Havard? A very educated human being.

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So this moose walks into the super-market and asks the lady woman at he counter "Got any potatoes?" Lady woman says "Down Isle 5" So the moose goes down isle 5 and there isn't any potatoes

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

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A man walks into a bar. Except its a metal bar, and he fractures his skull on it. He died in the hospital a few hours later

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Your mums so stupid. She bought an apple for 35p even though the shop across the road sells them for 34p

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whats worse than getting killed by a random tomahawk in COD mostly anything because COD is only a video game

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Knock Knock . . . I'm coming in!

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What's Green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels

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Whats the difference between a polish drunkard and a German scholar? They are two different nationalities.

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What smells like old people and is white? Talcum Powder.

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u suck

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? The chicken had no legs and was therefore incapable of committing to such a challenge.

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What the the newly born male dog get for his first birthday? A loss of two testicles.

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Warning: Are you 16 and curious and stuff? DO NOT SNIFF YOUR SISTERS HEAVILY PERFUMED PANTIES! Because you know hormones, and then 18 years later she uses the same perfume and... Yeeah.. ITS HORMONES! DON'T PRETEND YOU NEVER SMELLED A PUSS... Well, nevermind guys, I believe you :)) PS: By DO NOT, I mean DO! I mean just make sure you dont get your mothers panties, your sister is gonna be like "Omg you are such a perv you and your dick always up my face!" Then you can go all like "yeeeaah you wish!" Moms panties? Seriously man, that is just sick! You need to get some self respect!

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Why was there an awkward silence? Because numerous people gathered in a room were not talking.

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What do a book and a tractor have in common? Both are for driving, except the book.

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monster under your bed? thank god im in your closet...........

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What;s worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust.

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Romeny or Obama? Obamney

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Your mom is so poor she can't afford to buy herself nice things.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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