A priest, a minister, and a rabbi all walk into a bar and ask the bartender for a drink, but in response the bartender politely points out that there are probably people in need of their assistance at their respective place of warship.

A zen master walks up to a hot dog vendor and says, "Make me one with everything." The vendor says, "Sorry, we're out of relish." Then the zen master tells him, "Sir, I don't think you get the joke. As you can see by my long silk robes and fu manchu, I am clearly a zen master. And I have used a pun that would make you think I were asking for enlightenment from a hot dog." The vendor then says, "We don't take too kindly to wise guys here." And then the prick gets up and tosses me into the street!

You know what's really long? The bread lines in Africa

Did i just hear a joke about birds? No? Well this is Hawkward.

Harry Chappell raped someone

What do you get when you cross 3 men and a chainsaw? Answer: 2 and a half men

What's the deal with brown?

Q:What do you call Black Jesus ? A:Black Jesus a.w. j.p.

What did the apple say to the orange? The apple did not say anything at all because fruits do not possess the ability of speech.

Why can't Tom Maynard play cricket anymore Because he's dead

Why was the little boy late for school? Because he was hit by a truck.

A black guy walks into a bar. Suddenly, the bar goes quite, the music turns off and everybody stares. It was a gay bar and the man was very good looking.

Q: Whats the difference between a baby and a tire swing? A: I don't have a tire swing hanging in my backyard.

What is the difference between a black man and a sofa? A black man is a human being with feelings, while a sofa is an inanimate object that people sit on in order to enjoy comfort and possibly watch television.

Chrysanthemums our orange violettes are musical

What number is funnier than 23? 24.

What is worse than failing a class? Dress up for grown-ups.

A guy walks into a bar, has a drink then leaves.

Whats better than winning gold at the special olympics? Not being retarded.

Why couldnt jim jump rope? His feet were nailed to the ground.

Question: Whats worse then getting hit by a bus? Answer: Getting hit by a train.

What's the difference between a trampoline and a pile of dead babies? I have to take off my boots to jump on the trampoline.

What do you get when you hit a deer? A dead deer, which you should probably take home to eat - wouldn't want it to go to waste.

Q: How many babies does it take to paint a house? A: babies lack the intelligence and motor skills to accomplish such a task so it is not practical to hire them for a painting job.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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