I have sexdaily. I mean dyslexic. Fcuk!

the waterhorse is a beautiful creature. It often frolics through fields of wheat.

What has 3 legs? An abnormal human.

Why has the suicide in dentists decreased? -Due to the fact that being a dentist makes suicide redundant!

An Asian man is driving a car. He was on the way to the market to buy dinner for his family

Why did little timmy cry? He was nailed to a ceiling fan.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

Five people all from different backgrounds get in a car and nobody get's raped.

To the 'am i pregnant now?'-section: Yesterday I spilled mustard on my brand new pants. That was just before I went out to some clubs. That night, after I had enjoyed myself with friends and alcohol, while I was walking home I was raped several times by big, black and hung men. It hurt a lot and my anus is still bleeding. My question is: What is the best way to get rid of the mustard stain?

What did the little girl with cancer get for Christmas? Chemotherapy.

your mothers smells so bad,because she has poor hygiene skills

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall Humpty Dumbty took a great fall Because he was terribly intoxicated And failed to probably balance himself.

what does hi = good by cause person doesn't like you.

Your mama's so fat, that when she opened the window, wind came in!!!

What do you call a black guy who is a lifeguard An African American male who puts his safety before others

I agree Nero, we agree there, but let me ask you, why did you have the deep desire to create such a society before? You managed to do so as a teen, you wanted to help others, you put them before yourself, you where far more loyal to them, than they ever where to you. What motivated you then to sacrifice so much, where is that strength today?

what did the mushroom say to the other mushroom? nothing, mushrooms can't talk

A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

What's one thing that bothers EVERYONE? Mother Theresa

knock! knock! Who's there ...So y do you have a peep whole?

What do a gas and a liquid have in common? Nothing

Jesus, Mohammed, and Moses walk into a bar and sit down at a table. They glare at each other for a moment before turning to watch the baseball game. They support opposing teams.

A 8 year old kid and his dad are having quality time at the park,and relax at a nearby picnic bench after a thrilling game of tag."I love you." says the son. The father about to respond,promptly gets shot by 3 stray military issue assault rifle bullets that came from a heated dispute about a stolen car that got way out of hand. He dies,and the kid ran crying a long distance away. After he gets himself in a dark alley with nobody else around he laughs,and mutters "The plan went perfectly!" He pulls out a detonator and presses it. The White House,Washington Monument,and several nuclear power plants across the continental United States blow up,killing millions of people.The child,also in possession of nuclear bombs, holds the entire world hostage and becomes ruler of the entire planet Earth. Fin.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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