Roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet and so are you, but the roses are wilting, the violets are dead, the sugar bowl empty and so is your head.

What did the orphan kids get for Christmas? Cancer.

The Christian prayed every night to God for a new bike. He kept it up for a year. Finally, he got a bike for his birthday.

how do you get a clown off a swing??? hit him in the back with an ax!

Dr. I need a new butt, mine has a crack in it.

why cant stephen hawking dance He does not enjoy dancing

whats the difference between ebola and a can of dead babies? i have ebola. this isnt funny at all.

when life gives you skittles you take a handful and throw it at someone face and yell taste the rainbow

A black man, an Asian man, and an American man are in a car. Who is driving? The black man, it's his car.

Knock knock Who's There? Me I kill you again HA HA HA

There are two men named Dan. The first man says, "Hello, my name is Dan." The second man says, "Hello, my name is also Dan."

Are you from Tennesse because my uncle grew up there and I was wondering if you knew him.

"Your invited!" "Invited to what?" "I can't tell but everybody you know." " He he."

You know what topping goes bad with ice cream? Chloroform

What do you call a man who has a camera? a cameraman

Thank you Jesus, for this wonderful meal we have tonight. De nada.

how do you burn a lot of calories? set a fat kid on fire

A Mexican and a black man are in a car. Who's driving? The black man, because he was the designated driver for the night and was being helped by his good friend, Paco the Mexican, to quit his alcohol addiction. The AA meetings and rehab clininc were failing and he had lost his job. Jamaal, the black man, is now attending night school and holding down a part-time job at his local Baha Fresh. paco is very proud of him.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get KFC... Because hes a canibal!

Why did the girl drop out of school? She was being sexually assaulted by her mothers alcoholic boyfriend and was having trouble coping.

if you dont like sponge bob refrences.......... THEN **DOLPHIN NOISE*** you

What did Ben's Graandma get him for Christmas? Nothing, she died on Thanksgiving!

Knock knock. Who is their? Grammar. Grammar who? Of course you don't know.

Why did Osama bin Laden cross the road? To get shot in the face.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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