what has two eyes and a face? the 5 year old who got raped on his way back home last night.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Get in the van.

I'm Stephen Hawking, and I'm a PC. I can't walk or talk, and I'm a Stephen Hawkings

Q: What do sleeping pills and coffee have in common? A: Absolutely nothing

What do Jews always complain & want money for? Anything

Q: What do you call a cow with no legs? A: Lunch.

Why did the Armadyl godsword penetrated full Bandos? Because the AGS went up its tassets

Wanna hear a clean joke? I took a bath with bubbles. Wanna hear a dirty joke? Bubbles is the girl next door.

i was in bed with a girl recently and she said to me 'I want tonight to be magical', so afterwards i disappeared.

why does one side of a v-flock of geese have more birds? Because it does.

Is there any non dirty numbers these days, 69, just kidding

Whats worse then the quote "Do it, hit her!" The quote "Do it, Hitler!"

What caused the Berlin Wall to come down? Gravity

What did the man say to the duck? Nothing ducks don't talk.

What kinds of children go to heaven dead ones

I went to the doctors the other day for a check up and the doctors says to me "sorry your going to have to stop wanking" and I say to him " what! Why?" and the doctor says "I'm trying to examine you".

What's the difference between a poodle and a noodle? Scaboodle!

Q: How does a chicken get to work? A: A chicken does not go to work. Chickens can not legally be employed for any position in any country as they are chickens, are not human, and do not posses any prerequisites required to be hired for any existing employable position.

In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

What's black and is as fast as a car? A black car.

What's the difference between a Lamborghini and 10 dead babies? I don't keep a Lamborghini I'm my garage

what does a gay horse eat heeyyyyy

a horse nibbled a baby

A black man, a mexican, and a muslim all jump off a building. Who hit the ground first? Who cares!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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