"Your invited!" "Invited to what?" "I can't tell but everybody you know." " He he."

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If you have 12 apples and 7 oranges in one hand, and 9 apples and 10 oranges in one hand, what do you have? Very large hands.

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Why did the man remain calm when the judge passed the death sentence? Because he was in another country and had no connection with the case.

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Three men walked into a bar. None were injured because they were all wearing hard hats as is the procedure for a construction site.

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What is better than winning a gold medal at the special olympics? Not being retarded

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There once was a man who couldn't finish any sente

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Why couldn't the man see the camoflague iguana He could.

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There was 3 floors in a building. The man outside was watering plants. The man on the first floor was doing laundry. The man on the second floor was peeing out the window because the toilet wasn't working. The man on the third floor was cutting vegetables and accidentally dropped his knife out the window. Now, the four men all went out to tell what they did that day. The man on the third floor said that he was cutting veggies and dropped his knife out the window. The man on the second floor said that he got his wiener cut off. The man on the first floor said that he was just doing laundry. Then, the man outside said that he was watering plants and found a delicious sausage on the ground and he ate it.

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why did Samantha fall off the building? She was hit by a flying fridge dropped by a traffic helicopter.

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How do you get really high at home? You climb a ladder

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A rabbi and a priest walk into a bar, they manage to have a delightful evening, despite their religious differences.

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What's worse than finding out you have cancer? Nothing... (The game.)

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What did the Ginger get for Christmas? A: a soul

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A woman walks into the living room while her husband is watching tv. The husband tells her "Make me a Sandwich", so she goes to the kitchen and makes him a sandwich like shes told to.

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whats small and blue? a suffocated baby

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What did catwoman say to batman? meow.

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Why did jasmine drop her shopping? And no its not because she did'nt have arms infact she did have arms she just did'nt have any hands

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Q: Why do black people drink Grape Soda? A: Because it queches their thirst, and satisfies them.

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What's worse than being named SAID? Having AIDS.. And getting a bee sting - it hurts like ****!

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The Holocaust is worse than any number of bee stings. Unless, of course, bees separated people of certain ethnic backgrounds from their families and killed them off bit by bit by stinging them.

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Mickey Mouse peed on a house. Just kidding. Micky Mouse isn't real.

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Why was the boy upset? His penis fell off and his mom was making him go to the library.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven is black.

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Roses are black, Violets are black, and I'm blind .

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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