What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Two babies wonder off from their home. They die of starvation because there parents could not find them in time.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Knock knock. Who's there? Knock. Knock who? Knock knock.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A baby seal walks into a club.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Three men walked into a bar. Despite the fact that the bar was not an oblong piece of solid material as many would assume, the men entered through the tavern door simultaneously and found it most uncomfortable and awkward to be squished up against each other for several moments.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

I'm winning at Scrabble.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Roses are Red Violets are Blue The end is near I want a beer

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

RACIST JOKE: how to start a footrace in ghana role a donut down a hill

thumb_up thumb_down +7

two men walk into a bar. they get a concussion.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's black and white and red all over? A dead penguin.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Women's rights.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What 2 differences does a potato have in common? They both have very thin skin.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

I'd like to make this joke funnier but I can't. It's stupid. I don't even like it.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

"Your invited!" "Invited to what?" "I can't tell but everybody you know." " He he."

thumb_up thumb_down +7

How can you get a hot girl to notice you? Set her baby on fire.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A rabbit crosses a road... To be continued

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A Mexican and a black man are in a car. Who's driving? The black man, because he was the designated driver for the night and was being helped by his good friend, Paco the Mexican, to quit his alcohol addiction. The AA meetings and rehab clininc were failing and he had lost his job. Jamaal, the black man, is now attending night school and holding down a part-time job at his local Baha Fresh. paco is very proud of him.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did god make asians? I dont know. Yah, me niether

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why was a black man in a prison cell? He was a highly respected plumber fixing a prisoner's faulty toilet.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What did the Protoss player say when he lost to a Terran player? I concede defeat. You simply have a greater mastery over the game than I.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Three men walked into a bar. None were injured because they were all wearing hard hats as is the procedure for a construction site.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What is better than winning a gold medal at the special olympics? Not being retarded

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops