Why shouldnt you take the virginity of a 14 year old? Their pre-frontal lobe is not developed enough to sufficiently judge the affect of this action on their life.

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What did the pony say when it lost its voice? Nothing. Ponies are incapable of speech.

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I saw 2 cannibals eating a clown. What did I do? Called the local police.

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Why did Chuck Norris fall of the cliff? Because he was pushed.

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Oh no my baby is dead. Ha.

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Do you believe in Santa? Cuz i don't. Kookaburra

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Why did the dead baby cross the road? Cause it was stapled to the chicken.

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What do you call a person with no legs playing soccer? A soccer player.

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Why did the chicken help people across the road all day? Because after past experiences the chicken decided to become a lollypop chicken and help people not make the mistakes he did

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3 men check in to a motel. They all decide to leave given the eminent danger of being the butt of a homosexual joke.

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So a man walks into a bar, And because he is dressed in such a way that was thought of as threatening to the general safety of the highly valued customers, he is shot eight times in the head.

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What did the smiley face say to the other smiley face? Nothing. They just smiled.

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How many women does it take to screw in a lightbulb? ...get back in the kitchen, I'm hungry

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How do you get a clown to stop laughing? Throw an axe at it's face.

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What did the man with a cold say when a jew walked into a bar? Hahaha you walked into a bar. What did the man with a cold say when a jew walked into a pub? AHH-JOOOOO!!!

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A horse walks into a bar. the bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse does not reply because it is a horse. The horse walks out of the bar kicking over some chairs and scaring some people because he is a horse and horses do not belong in public atmospheres.

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A duct walks into a bar. The writer meant to write duck and then proceed to make a clever joke but instead a typo was made and a very unlikely occurence was writtern about considering air passages are not capable of walking and would most likely already be in the ceiling of the bar as too bring fresh air into the bar is important.

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Kris- "Hey! Ask me if I'm a tree! Kait&Alyssa- ".....Are you a tree?...." Kris- "No.(:"

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Why did the blonde switch the lamp on? Because it was getting dark

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Yo mama so fat when she looked at the scale it said to be continued

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What did the oncologist say to his patient? You have terminal cancer.

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What's the easiest way to load dead babies into a tractor trailer? Pitchfork.

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You know what they say about priests with big rosaries? I don't know, it's in Latin.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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