Once upon a time there was a pure and beautiful girl who lived with her step-mother and her two step-sisters. They made her live in the basement and had her do all the chores while they went to parties. Then social workers came and relocated her to a foster family.

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whats funnier than 24? 25

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sean punches bryce in the face, sean then says ow you just punched me in the face. that hurt

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What's the difference between a piano and a goldfish? One's a piano, the other is a goldfish.

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What's the difference between Dick Cheney and Obama? When Obama shoots someone in the face it's bin Laden.

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Your momma is so fat that when she fell over, she couldn't get back up without help, and she probably got several bruises.

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Whats white and can talk? Snow, i lied about the colour

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is a woman.

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A small plane is carrying three passengers: a young boy scout, a priest, and the smartest black man on earth. Due to improper planning, there are only three parachutes on the plane. The engines cut and the pilot takes a parachute and jumps out of the plane. The black man says, "I am the smartest black man in the world. I need to live." He takes a parachute and jumps out of the plane. The priest says to the boy scout, "Son, you take the last parachute. I have lived a full life." After a very touching moment, the boy scout puts on the parachute and jumps out of the plane. Minutes later, the priest dies a horrific death as the plane crashes into the desert.

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a little boy takes his lacrosse stick to his mom and says "hey mom this is bob" the mom says "hi bob" and she says to her son "does bob say hi back?" and the boy says "no mom. hes a lacrosse stick."

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Hi

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OH LOOK I'M A SAILOR I KNOW NAUTICAL PHRASES! LIKE...... KNOTS AND MAST AND SHIP AND SEA AND STUFF

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2 sausages were in a frying pan. 1 sausage says it sure is hot in here, the other sausage says WTF a talking sausage!

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how makes licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop? depends on how determined you are to find out

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Whats brown and sticky? A stick.

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A Chinese man and an american lived together. The Chinese man said to the american man, "I'm going to walk the dog." The American said "OK." Later that night they were eating dinner. The American said to the Chinese man, "I don't think that I've had this meat before. What is it?" The Chinese man replied, "The dog." The American, surprised, spewed out the food he was eating. "THE DOG!?" he yelled, shocked. The Chinese man replied, "Yes, I TOLD you I was going to wok the dog!"

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When life gives you melons, your dyslexic

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Why did the man fall of the cliff? A: Because someone pushed him.

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5 - samios in a wheelchair.

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Paul walker: Breaks, stop Breaks: no

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This made my day: The Japanese verb "to drink" is "nomimasu". [L]

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why did the kid raise his hand in class because he had a question

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What did Cinderella wear at the ball? Clothes

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how did the ant die? i stepped on it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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